your words in my memory are like music to me
by Becks Rylynn
Summary: I had to make a life for myself, Dean. Away from hunting and hunters and anything supernatural. I had to do it for her. A reinvention of the Lila Bray 'verse. Minor TVD crossover.
1. pray that something picks me up

_AN: Okay, so I shouldn't be doing this but...what can I say? I can't help myself. I have no self control, after all._

_So this story is basically a reinvention of the Lila Bray 'verse and it goes along with my story 'i would travel so far to get back to where you are' which is in the 'a million little stars spelling out your name' collection. That story is basically a prequel to that one. After I wrote it I just couldn't get the idea of Ruby and Bray traveling the world together out of my mind so this was born. _

_Just to warn you, there will be a crossover with The Vampire Diaries in part two. The reason I'm not putting this in the crossover section is because the crossover isn't the main storyline. This story is mainly about Ruby. This story was also supposed to be a oneshot, but I divided it into two parts for a couple of reasons. Reason number one: The pacing works better if part one and two are separated. Reason number two: I really wanted to be able to post it today, on December 10th because December 10th is Lila Bray's birthday. She turns two today. And yes, I am aware she is fictional, but I've spent so long writing her that her fictional birthday feels like an actual family member's birthday. So happy birthday, Lila Bray!_

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**Title:**_ your words in my memory (are like music to me)  
_**Summary:** ''I had to make a life for myself, Dean. Away from hunting and hunters and anything supernatural. I had to do it for her.'' Twoshot. A reinvention of the Lila Bray 'verse.  
**Pairing: **Dean/Ruby, minor Damon Salvatore/Ruby in part two.  
**Genre:** Romance/Family.  
**Rating:** T for language.  
**Timeline:** Starts in the summer after season three and goes until the summer after season five.  
**Spoilers:** Spoilers for seasons three, four and five.  
**Warnings:** Very brief mentions of pregnancy, a buttload of references to things Katie Cassidy has done since being on SPN (Harper's Island is a very noticeable one), crossover with The Vampire Diaries in part two and heavy AU.  
**Notes: **Main title and chapter titles are from the song _Set Fire to the Third Bar _by Snow Patrol.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own anything.

* * *

**your words in my memory (are like music to me)**

_Written by Becks Rylynn_

* * *

**Part One; **_pray that something picks me up_

_

* * *

_

Lila Bray Winchester is her mother's daughter, through and through. That has never been a question. With her mother's patented flair for the dramatics, she comes into the world screaming at the top of her lungs while a blizzard rages outside in the cold December night.

Ruby gives birth alone in a cold hospital room with only two nurses and a doctor on December 10th, 2008 at 10:43 pm. There is no Dean to kiss her forehead and cry with her in astonishment at the life they've created. There is no Sam to hold her hand and tell her she's doing great. There's just her, gripping the hospital sheets so tightly she fears they will disintegrate under her hold. The strange thing is, she doesn't mind. She doesn't mind that she's all alone without a Winchester in sight. When that baby girl comes screaming into the world, she stops caring about anything but her daughter.

In the moment, she doesn't mind that she's alone. (She will.)

* * *

(She found out she was pregnant a month after Dean died, when she was nearly three months along. At first there was only crushing fear and panic. But then she decided she needed to grow the fuck up and take charge of her life. She settled in a small town in Missouri, got a normal everyday job and focused on getting her life together so she could give her baby everything.

She found out Dean was alive on September 15th from a contact who claimed to have come face to face with him. (The same contact would come back to haunt her later.) He was alive again. He was alive because of angels. She wasn't really sure what to make of that. She wasn't as terrified of angels as her contact was, but she was still pretty wary of them. Because _angels? Really?_ That was some pretty serious mojo. Then again, she always did know Dean Winchester was special.

She remembers the day because it was the same day she learned she was having a girl. Her first thought was that she had to find him and tell him about the baby. Ultimately, she decided her daughter_ couldn't _have that life filled with demons and apocalypses and a father who could die at any given moment.

And that was the end of that.)

* * *

Motherhood is the hardest thing she has ever done but she wouldn't trade it for the world.

Bray is two weeks old when Christmas comes around and Ruby knows she won't remember it but she does the tree and the bows and the gifts anyway because Bray should have everything. It makes her feel like she's doing a good job.

On Christmas night, she calls Dean just to hear his voice (she did this while she was in labor too, but when she heard his voice she hurled the phone at the wall because it was his fault she was in so much pain).

When he says, _''Hello?''_ she gives up and throws the phone at the Christmas tree.

Bray starts to cry.

* * *

On New Year's Eve, she comes home and finds the contact who informed her Dean was alive standing in her apartment, watching the snow fall out the window.

''Kristy.'' Ruby blinks and her grip on her daughter tightens. ''What are you doing here?''

The other demon eyes Bray and her eyes thrill with something Ruby is not at all comfortable with. ''Is that her? She's pretty. She looks a lot like her parents.'' She takes a step forwards to examine the baby. Ruby takes a step back. Kristy frowns thoughtfully. ''She's got a lot of her dad in her, doesn't she?''

Ruby stiffens. Bray's dad is the last person she wants to talk about. ''What do you want?''

Kristy shrugs. ''To talk.''

Ruby hesitates and eventually sighs. ''Give me a minute.'' She edges around the other woman to escape down the hallway in order to put Bray to bed and keep her safe. She's not exactly sure where this is going, but most likely it's not going anywhere good. Kristy has never been the nicest demon. Never really been patient either. She's a bitter, jealous demon chick who tires of humans much too easily. Ruby has kept her on a leash for awhile now because despite her flaws, Kristy is good at getting information and she is the one tie to Ruby's former human life that remains. But since she had Bray, keeping her demonic associates in check has become less of a priority. That's going to be a problem, isn't it?

When Ruby gets back, Kristy is in the kitchen, perched on the counter as she flips through a magazine and waits for the coffee to brew. ''What do you want to talk about?'' Ruby asks carefully, crossing her arms. She strategically places herself in front of the kitchen door in order to prevent Kristy from getting to Bray.

Kristy drops to the ground and flicks the magazine away. ''I want to talk about the Winchesters.''

Something that has lain dormant for a very long time rears its ugly head and Ruby grins like a Cheshire cat, showing off her teeth. ''Oh,'' she tilts her head to the side. ''I was hoping you'd say that.'' She moves fast; faster than Kristy and before Kristy can even gasp, Ruby has darted forwards, grabbed a steak knife and slammed her old 'friend' face down against the counter, twisting her arm behind her back and holding the knife against the back of her neck. ''I'd like the truth now please. What kind of game are you playing at? Hmm?''

''What...'' Kristy gasps for air she doesn't need, squirming under Ruby's hold. ''What are you talking about?''

''You _know_ what I'm talking about. You're forgetting we were in the same coven, Kris. I have literally known you for hundreds of years. I know your poker face. I know when you're playing at something. So tell me...what are you really doing here?''

Kristy says nothing.

Ruby shrugs. ''Okay dokie then. Just remember you asked for it, babe.'' She gives up the knife, twisting Kristy's arm back until she hears the distinct sound of a bone snapping. Kristy doesn't scream, but she gasps and whimpers pathetically, sounding vaguely reminiscent of a wounded animal. Ruby steps back and watches the brunette slump to the ground. ''One more time,'' Ruby says carefully. ''What are you doing here?''

Kristy turns and glares up at her briefly before she snaps her arm back into place and rises to her feet. ''I'm here because I want you to join me.''

''Fat chance, Drusilla. Get out of my kitchen.''

Kristy sighs and shakes her head. ''Ruby,'' she says patiently. ''You're on the wrong side.''

''No,'' Ruby counters calmly. ''That'd be_ you, _sweetie. It doesn't matter which way you slice it, you know. Good will always win out over evil. That's just the way the world works.''

''Not this time,'' Kristy says with a devilish gleam in her eyes.

''Don't get cocky,'' Ruby mutters. ''It doesn't suit you. Why are you even asking me this?''

''Believe it or not,'' Kristy says softly. ''I care about you.''

''You have never cared about anyone besides yourself,'' Ruby retorts. ''Even when we were human, all you cared about was yourself.''

''If you come over to our side,'' Kristy continues flawlessly. ''I can make sure you and your daughter are safe.''

Ruby snorts. ''Whether or not I go over to your side, Bray will never be safe. She's a Winchester. Evil can smell it in her blood. Even worse, they can smell _me_ in her blood. I'm not well received among the demon community in case you've forgotten that little fact. She'd be cannon fodder if I willingly walked over to the darkside just because you guys have cookies.''

Kristy smiles and pours herself a cup of freshly brewed coffee. She leans back against the counter, takes a sip and stares intently at Ruby. After a moment of her tapping her un-manicured nails against the counter, she shrugs and meets Ruby's eyes. ''Well, so what? You're a demon. You're fucking _Ruby. _Before this kid, you were only looking out for number one.''

Ruby purses her lips and narrows her eyes. ''Yeah.'' She reacts on pure instinct, grasping her discarded knife and slamming it down. The knife pierces through both Kristy's hand and the counter top, pinning her briefly as she shrieks in shock and pain. Ruby sneers. ''But then I became a mom. Now, kindly get out of my life and don't come back.'' She turns away for half a second to catch her breath. There's a noise behind her and she whirls around just in time to catch the knife when it's inches away from her eye.

''What are you gonna do, _tubbers_?'' Kristy bites out. ''You can't kill me. You don't have your knife. You can't exorcise me unless you want a one way ticket to Hell too. You're pretty much helpless here.''

''You know, you're right,'' Ruby nods. ''I can't kill you.'' She smirks and reaches out, grabbing a fistful of Kristy's hair and yanking her head backwards. She trails the knife over Kristy's exposed throat and gets a sick sense of satisfaction when the other woman swallows hard. ''But what I can do is carve you up until you're nothing but an unrecognizable pile of blood and flesh and bones on my kitchen floor. I can cut off your tongue so you don't talk back, slice through your throat, peel your skin off piece by piece, break every one of your fingers and you'll still be alive. Feeling it all. It'll be just like what you did to me in Hell. Remember that? But to be honest, there are a few problems with that scenario. A: It's messy. B: Your screams would be an endless source of annoyance to me. And C: I don't have that kind of time because sometime very soon I'm going to need to feed my daughter.'' She shoves Kristy away from her and points the knife at her. ''Your choice. Leave or face me. What's it gonna be?''

For a second, Kristy looks like she wants to fight back. Then she leaves. Unsurprising. Ruby is well aware of how scary she can be sometimes. She stands in the doorway, watches the brunette stalk down the hall and can't help but add, ''And by the way, just because I haven't lost the baby weight yet doesn't mean I'm fat. It means I'm _curvy_!'' She thinks about slamming the door, but Bray's sleeping so she settles for shutting it quietly and stomping her foot in frustration instead.

She leans back against the door heavily and closes her eyes. That? Is going to come back to bite her in the ass. She can feel it.

(Wounded and pouting, Kristy goes back to the bed of lies she has made for herself. With the Winchesters. As the new and improved, soft and manipulative _Ruby 2.0 _who makes Sam drink her blood and Dean feel like what they had meant nothing to her. The real Ruby will learn eventually that Kristy does not like to be put on a leash.)

* * *

She won't say she gets the hang of being a single parent because can anyone ever really get the hang of that? But she does her best and Bray generally seems to be a happy baby so she figures she must be doing something right.

* * *

On January 24th, she seriously considers calling Dean and telling him everything. She's not sure if it's because she's just in a good mood today or if his birthday is getting her sentimental. Either way, it's the first time since she learned he was alive that she has seriously considered telling him he has a family out there in the big, scary world.

''It's Daddy's birthday today, baby girl,'' she coos softly to her daughter as she's dressing her. ''He's 30. You be sure and tell him if you ever see him, that he is officially a cranky old man now.''

Eventually, she calls. This time, she vows, she's going to say something. She's going to tell him everything. All of it. Every little secret she has kept. She's going to tell him that she's alive and that they have the most beautiful daughter in the world and that she misses him. But then this happens:

_''Hello?''_ The voice is groggy, breathy, light and decidedly female. Ruby's pretty sure she's probably a bar tramp. _''Are you calling for...Hey...''_ There's a pause. _''What's your name again?''_

Ruby flips the phone shut, rolls her eyes and pretends that didn't sting. ''Well, that's fine,'' she says confidently and isn't sure if she's talking to Bray or herself. ''We don't need him, do we, Bray?''

Bray seems to sigh, looking up at her mother as if to say_ yes, we do._

_

* * *

_

February. March. April. The months fly by much too quickly and May 2nd hits her like a ton of bricks. Not only is it Sam's birthday but it's the day Dean died. It's the day that changed _everything_. At night, Bray lays beside her on the bed, kicking her feet and giggling at nothing while tears slip out of her mother's eyes.

It doesn't really matter what she says; she _does_ miss him.

That's just the way it goes.

* * *

On her first Mother's Day, she forgets. She has never celebrated Mother's Day before so to her it's just another day. Nothing special. Other people, however, remember.

She's at the supermarket with Bray on her hip when a little boy with floppy brown hair, puppy dog eyes and a shy smile approaches her. He reminds her of Sam and she has to swallow. He gives her a single red carnation and says, ''Happy Mother's Day.''

It makes her remember why she so badly wants the humans to win this war.

She smiles at the boy with watery eyes, kisses his cheek and watches him run back to his surprised mother who looks like she's so proud she wants to cry. She tells Bray, ''Don't be like me and don't be like your dad. Be like that.''

* * *

Red carnations mean _my heart aches for you._

When she remembers that, she looks over at her daughter who has Dean's smile.

* * *

On Father's Day, she makes the first move.

Holding her breath, she sends a picture of Bray to Dean's phone. That's it.

His move now.

* * *

In July, the life she has built for herself shifts under her feet and leaves her scrambling to hang on. In the summer, Dean finds her.

* * *

It's unbearably hot and humid and she almost can't take it. It's a nightmare to get Bray to sleep these days and Ruby herself has taken to sleeping in nothing but her bra and underwear. It's a sticky, sweaty kind of heat that reminds her of Hell.

Even worse, the heat makes her dream. She can take a lot but the dreams she starts to have leave her aching and gasping for breath. She dreams of Dean and the life they could have and it hurts her more than she'll ever admit.

One night, on a Friday in the middle of the night, she is torn out of her feverish slumber by the sound of knocking. It pulls her out of her dream about Dean and Bray and a picket fence and she groans in displeasure. She all but tumbles out of bed, slips on her thin silk robe and staggers down the hallway towards the front door, praying Bray will stay sleeping.

And then she opens the door and thinks she might die. His eyes widen and he takes a step backwards, looking more shocked than she does. ''It's you,'' he whispers.

''Dean,'' she rasps. ''..._Dean_.'' She tries to come up with something intelligent to say but her past is standing in front of her looking tired and beaten down and she is currently five second away from overheating (which his surprise appearance is not exactly helping with, by the way because beaten down or not, he still looks _really_ good and she hasn't gotten laid in a _very_ long time, okay?). She stands there for a moment, clutching the door and trying to calm her racing heart and then he decides to make the first move.

He moves impossibly fast and before she can say a word, he's stepping over the threshold and pulling her into his arms. She tenses momentarily but when he sighs and buries his face in her hair, she melts into his embrace and closes her eyes. It's been a very long time, after all, and she's tired of pretending she doesn't miss him. Most of all, she's tired of being without him. ''I thought I'd lost you,'' he whispers gruffly and the emotion in his voice surprises her because she's never heard him talk like that. Not to her anyway.

She pulls away and tries to smirk. It shakes and she winds up biting her lip nervously and peering at him through her eyelashes. ''Well,'' she starts. ''You found me.''

His hand trails down her arm until he's gripping her wrist lightly and a slow chuckle escapes his lips. She shivers even though she's not at all cold. He lets go of her wrist and takes a step back. ''I found you.''

* * *

''Why didn't you tell me?''

She throws a look over her shoulder briefly before turning away. ''When I found out I was pregnant, you were _dead_.''

''But then I came back,'' he states evenly. ''And since you don't seem surprised to see me, I'm going to assume you knew about that.''

She shakes her head tiredly and moves over to him, sliding a cup of coffee across the table towards him. He's staring at her with his arms crossed and his unwavering gaze is starting to make her uncomfortable. She sits down across from him and grips her own coffee mug perhaps a bit too tightly. ''I had to make a life for myself, Dean. Away from hunting and hunters and anything supernatural. I had to do it for her. I owe it to that little girl to give her a better life.''

His eyes flash and he leans forwards. ''But she's my little girl too,'' he hisses in frustration. ''She is my daughter too, Ruby, and I had a right to know she existed!''

''I know that!'' She looks away from him and scrubs at her tired eyes as her breathing speeds up. ''I know that she's yours and I know that you have just as much right to her as I do, but...'' She closes her eyes. ''Dean...''

''You should have told someone,'' he says firmly. ''If not me then Sam or Bobby. There is no reason why you had to do it all alone. I would have come when you were pregnant. You know that. I could've been there for you.''

''Dean,'' she cuts in, lips drawn into a tight line. ''In case you're forgetting this key piece of information, there is a fucking _war_ going on right now. Do you want our daughter to be a part of that? Do you want her to end up as collateral damage? 'Cause I sure don't.'' She swallows whatever is rising in her throat (it's not cries; she doesn't cry) and tries to slow her breathing. ''She needs to come first. She needs to be safe. I need to keep her safe, Dean. You have no idea,'' her eyes burn and her voice breaks and that _she doesn't cry _thing is looking more and more like a bitter lie. ''How much I _needed you _when I was pregnant or how much I wish things could be different. But...everything I do has to be for her now. Not you. Not...'' She gestures in between them with a frown. ''...Whatever we were or weren't.''

''Ruby.'' He lets out a breath and pinches the bridge of his nose. ''I just...I needed to know you were alive. You don't understand what went on, all right? There's so much you don't know. If you had just told us you were here so many things could have been avoided. She wouldn't have gotten to us like she did. She wouldn't have had the chance to _lie_.''

''What are you talking about? She who?''

Dean suddenly sucks in a breath and presses his lips together as if realizing he has said too much. His chair scrapes back against the floor and he stands, running a hand through his hair. He doesn't say anything and that familiar feeling of alarm sinks into her stomach. ''Dean, what's going on?'' She stands and takes a hesitant step towards him. ''What happened? I need you to talk to me.''

''Ruby...'' He looks ashamed, staring into her eyes like he's begging for forgiveness. She really doesn't like where this is going. ''All you need to know is that I'm sorry.''

''No.'' She closes the distance between them and grasps his shirt. ''That's not all I need to know. I need to know what the hell you're talking about. What are you sorry for?''

He avoids her eyes, looking down at the grip she has on his shirt. His fingers move over hers for a second and then he sighs. ''There was...There was this woman...''

She tenses and resists the urge to roll her eyes because what he does with his sex life is none of her business anymore. She's well aware he's hardly been celibate. Remember the birthday phone call? Yeah, that was all the proof she needed. ''Dean, I - ''

''She told us...We thought she was you.''

She freezes and her body goes rigid. ''What?''

''She got to Sam first,'' he explains quietly. ''While I was dead, she got to him. Made him think she was you. She...She was there for him when I wasn't and when I came back I knew - I _knew _something was off. You..._She_ was so different.''

''And...'' She clears her throat. ''And you knew right away that it wasn't me, right?''

He doesn't answer.

She clenches her teeth. ''When did you realize it wasn't me?''

He shifts from foot to foot and can't look her in the eye. That's a bad sign. ''When you sent me that picture, I had Bobby trace the call and then I had a...friend check out the town. When they told me they saw you - ''

''It took you _that long_?''

''I'm sorry, okay? But I saw what Lilith did to you and I wanted so badly to think that you were alive. I had to choose between believing she was you or accepting you were dead and I'd...much rather hate you than accept your death. Ruby, why are you shaking your head? Ruby - ''

When she lets go of him and tries to move away from him, he grasps her hand. She slaps his hand away and glowers at him. ''Let me take a wild guess,'' she sneers. ''She turned on you. Am I right? She was lying all alone?''

He flinches and looks at the ground like a child being scolded. ''Yes.''

''And you were just...so ready to believe that was me?'' She smirks bitterly. ''That I would lie to you? That I would betray you? What kind of fucking moron are you, Dean? I thought you knew me better than that! Do you even know me at all? I told you things I never even...'' She scoffs in disgust and turns away from him to swipe a hand over her cheeks.

''She was convincing,'' he says quietly, like that's some sort of excuse.

''Yeah?'' She whirls around to face him. ''What'd she do? Fuck you into believing she was me?''

He grimaces at that. ''Actually, I wasn't the one she was fucking.''

It takes her a minute to figure out what that means. And then horror crashes down and her eyes widen in terror. ''Oh, god. _Sam?_ You actually thought I would...Dean, how many times did I tell you he was like a brother to me? How could you ever think I would...?'' She trails off and swallows thickly. ''You believed she was me because you didn't want me to be dead? You think hating me is so much easier than grieving for me? God, are you that afraid of - ''

''Of losing you?'' He snaps. ''Yes, you idiot! I am _that afraid _of losing you!''

''Don't shout at me!''

''Don't question my feelings for you.''

''Stop trying to turn this around on me.''

He rolls his eyes and throws his hands up in the air, turning away from her. She sits down, crossing one leg over the other. She stares down into her untouched coffee and absently tugs her robe closer to avoid flashing Dean her cleavage. (Not that he hasn't seen it before.) She takes a few deep breaths to calm herself down and licks her lips. ''This woman,'' she begins slowly. ''What did she look like?''

It doesn't take her long to realize who it is. Halfway through Dean's description of this mysterious identity thief, she is practically shaking in rage and is this close to pulling her own hair out of her head because she's so frustrated. Her throat literally aches with screams of anger. She should have known. She should have known Kristy would try something like this. Kristy never handled rejection well. ''Her name is Kristy,'' she says lowly. ''She...I knew her a long time ago. When I was human. She was a sister witch. She taught me everything I know. She died a few years before I did and when I got downstairs...'' She clears her throat. ''Well, you of all people should know what happens down there.''

He doesn't say anything, but she thinks she might see his jaw clench for a fraction of a second.

''We got out at the same time,'' she goes on. ''She was this...heartless demon and I was different. I tried to keep her under control, but after Bray was born, I just didn't have the time. She came to me in January and asked me to join her. I said no and I haven't seen her since. I kept waiting for her to retaliate but she never did. I guess...I know why now.''

''Why didn't you kill her?''

''With what?'' She snaps. ''You took my knife, remember?''

''Why didn't you kill her before?''

''Because she was the last thing I had to tie myself to my human life and I wanted to hang onto that. Besides, she was useful.'' Ruby shrugs and leans back against her chair. ''How do you think I always knew where you boys were? You think I spent all my time stalking you?'' She snorts. ''That's pathetic. I made her do it. That way I could know where you were and if you needed help and she stayed out of trouble.'' She bites the inside of her cheek and picks at her cuticles for a minute before she allows herself to speak. ''She...'' She looks up to meet his gaze. ''She's dead, right? You killed her? She won't come back?''

''She's dead,'' he confirms. ''I killed her.''

She lets out a breath. She can't even begin to describe the feeling of relief that is currently sinking into her bones. The last bit of her past life is gone and all she can feel is relief. ''Good,'' she eventually whispers.

They sit in silence for a moment and just when he's finally managed to catch her eye, a familiar sound echoes through the room. She jumps at the sound of her daughter crying. Dean, however, stills completely. His eyes widen and she sees him swallow hard. She hesitates and then stands, moving towards the hallway. ''Ruby,'' he calls after her. ''Can I...Can I meet her?''

She nods. ''Yeah. ...Yeah, of course.''

And then before she makes her getaway down the hall, she turns, scowls and punches him in the face. Hey, he believed Kristy was her. She figures the least he deserves is a punch in the face. ''The next time you want to believe someone else is me, I want you to take a step back and ask yourself 'would an idiot believe this bitch's story?' And then, you know, don't believe the bitch's story. Okay, idiot?''

When he starts to chuckle around the blood in his mouth, she decides to escape.

* * *

There is no hesitation at all when Ruby hands Bray over to Dean. He's her dad and he deserves to hold her at least once. He accepts the baby with open arms and if there's a moment of discomfort or a second where he's unsure about what he's doing it's not noticeable. Dean looks at Bray like she's the most precious thing in the world (which she is) and Ruby knows she is always going to wish things could be different. She wishes this stupid war could all be avoided so she could have it all with her daughter and Dean.

(But that's not going to happen, is it?)

''She has your smile, you know,'' she whispers, keeping her eyes on Bray when Dean looks up at her. The baby is curled up in her daddy's lap, half asleep as her tiny fist opens and closes around Dean's shirt. It would be so perfect if there wasn't a black cloud hanging over their head.

''She has your eyes,'' he counters.

She smiles when Bray opens her sleepy eyes.

''When's her birthday?'' He asks softly.

''December 10th.''

''...Ruby,'' his voice is hoarse and rough and she lifts her eyes to his green eyes. ''I don't think I have much time left.''

''What?''

''This war,'' he clarifies. ''I don't expect to make it out alive. And I wish I could promise you...'' He looks down at his daughter and Ruby pretends she doesn't notice the way his eyes mist over for about a half a second before his walls go up. ''I wish I could promise her everything. I wish I could...come back to you. But I can't. You know I can't.''

She stands, smiles sadly and grazes her fingers over his cheek. ''I know.'' She leans down to press a lingering kiss to the side of his mouth because he just looks so _sad._ ''Just enjoy holding your daughter,'' she pleads. ''Just for this one moment.''

He catches her hand before it falls away and squeezes, holding her gaze. ''She really is the most beautiful girl in the world.''

She smirks and picks up the forgotten coffee cups. ''Of course she is.''

''She must get that from you.''

She stops in her tracks and throws a look over her shoulder. This time, when he meets her eyes, she shudders even though it's downright stifling in this room. Dean looks away from her, back to Bray and Ruby has to catch her breath.

She's heard this song before.

It's not hard to remember how it ends.

* * *

Eventually, she reluctantly tears Bray away from Dean, who is now officially enthralled in everything the baby girl does. It's necessary because Bray needs her sleep...

...But that leaves Mom and Dad alone with all that lies between them and the hot, sweaty summer heat that sinks into their skin.

* * *

It ends...pretty much like you'd think it would.

It's unflinchingly easy to fall back into old familiar patterns and habits like maps she has read over and over again. Before she can comprehend what's happening, she's on her table with her legs around Dean's waist and his tongue in her mouth. Her skin feels like it's on fire, her blond hair gets in her eyes and Dean's fingers scratch at her bare legs as he breathes out a, ''God, I've missed you'' into her mouth.

She knows that this is so wrong and she knows that it can only end in heartache because he will have to leave, but at the moment she doesn't care. Like, at all. When his lips move to her neck and she tilts her head back to allow him access, she knows she's in trouble. When his calloused fingers push away her robe, leaving her only in her bra and underwear and her fingers scrape off his shirt, her breath catches and her heart races. But when his fingers snake towards her underwear and begin to slide them off, she stops thinking altogether and reaches for the buckle on his jeans.

(Yes, it's bad. But it's _so good_.)

* * *

She wakes up alone.

It's unsurprising, but it still somehow manages to sting and itch like a fresh, bleeding wound. She closes her eyes and rakes a hand through her hair and that's when the smell of pancakes wafts through the air. For a second, she thinks she's hallucinating. But then she hears his low voice followed by high pitched giggles that undoubtedly belong to her daughter and she knows this is real. She slips out of bed and into a pair of sweatpants and a tank top that already feel too warm before making her way down the hallway and into the kitchen.

As soon as she sees them, a wide smile breaks out on her face and she leans against the doorframe, crossing her arms over her chest.

Dean has Bray on his hip as he flips pancakes and the baby plays with the amulet around his neck. It's a picture perfect moment and Ruby will forever be upset that she doesn't have a camera handy. Two years ago, domestication was so far down on the list of things she wanted in her life that she couldn't even see it. Now...

Now that stereotypical picket fence is all she can think about with Dean Winchester standing in her kitchen trying to play Nathan Scott to her Haley James. (Don't judge her. That is a very popular TV show.)

''Take a picture, sweetheart,'' Dean drawls. ''It'll last longer.''

(She's sure he hadn't meant for those words to sound as bittersweet as they do.)

With a smile, she pushes off the doorframe and moves into the kitchen. ''I'm just a little surprised,'' she says, taking Bray into her arms. ''I kind of expected you to do the walk of shame.''

He laughs. ''I feel no shame about last night. Seriously, you - '' He stops short and slides his gaze to Bray, who's looking up at him with wide eyes as she toys with Ruby's hair. ''Well, I'd say something really crude but there's an infant present. Let's just say the label MILF suits you.''

She giggles (and doesn't even care that she just _giggled_) and touches his face lightly. ''Thanks...I think.'' She brushes past him gently to get Bray into her high chair while Dean moves around her effortlessly. When Ruby makes a move to get Bray some breakfast, Dean is already sliding a bowl of dry cheerios towards her. Ruby blinks, takes the bowl and when he notices her dumbfounded expression, he smirks and she looks away, adamantly refusing to believe she's blushing. ''Dean,'' she tears her eyes away from Bray briefly. ''What are you doing here?''

''Making breakfast,'' he deadpans. ''You didn't get that?''

_''Dean.''_

He sighs and slides a pancake onto a plate before turning to face her. ''I'm just...not ready to leave yet.''

''Dean - ''

''Ruby, I want to spend the day with my girls. Is that such a bad thing?''

She whips her head around to face him. It could be a slip of the tongue or just an endearment that isn't meant to mean anything. It's something very simple but when Dean calls her and Bray his girls, everything freezes. And when he looks at her with those twinkling eyes...

...When he looks at her, the bottom drops out.

Holy crap.

She's in love with him.

She doesn't just miss him and she doesn't just need him in her life because they have a child together. She is one hundred percent, totally and completely ass backwards _can't-see-straight-when-I- think-about-you-I-touch-myself-we'll-always-have-Paris-I-wanna-grow-old-with-you_ in love with Dean Winchester. Of all the people in the world she could have -

...Nah. She can't even act surprised.

She practically leaps to her feet, grabbing his face and planting a kiss on his lips. He pulls her closer with one hand and tangles the other in her hair. ''Okay,'' she whispers breathlessly when she pulls away. ''Spend some time with us.''

He smiles gratefully and then covers it with a smirk. ''And maybe later we can do dirty things with the syrup.''

She rolls her eyes and punches him on the shoulder.

* * *

Its summer and the days last so long it's gotten to the point where Ruby can't wait for winter because then the days will be short and the heat will be replaced with cold. But this day passes by too quickly and she misses the sun when it goes down. Dean has spent the day treating Bray (he calls her by her full name, Lila Bray, and refuses to call her anything else) like a princess and it's clear Bray utterly adores her daddy.

Dean spends money he doesn't really have on gifts that aren't necessary like he's trying to make up for the fact that he's going to be leaving soon and he looks at Ruby like he used to and the blissful day is everything she didn't want to admit she was waiting for. It's going to make everything ten times harder when he inevitably leaves her feeling empty and alone.

Bray is already asleep when the sun goes down and instead of putting her in her crib Ruby places the sleeping child on her bed and lies down beside her. She studies the girl and lightly traces her hand over Bray's head. She closes her eyes and listens to the sound of Dean puttering around in the kitchen.

This is the way it's supposed to be. This is the way it should work and it's not fair that it's going to end so soon. It's not fair that she has to lose Dean after she just got him back. (She thinks she should be used to it by now. She never gets what she wants and her life is always unfair.)

When she opens her eyes, Dean is standing in the doorway watching them with his arms crossed over his chest. There's this look in his eyes that makes her want to cry and his lips are pinched together tightly. ''We could do it,'' he whispers, voice low and gravelly. ''This whole...relationship and parenting thing. We could do it.''

She can't help but laugh lightly at his wording, sitting up. ''Are you asking me to wait for you?''

He frowns thoughtfully and takes a seat next to Bray. ''Would you?''

She watches his fingers brush Bray's cheek. ''I don't know. Do you really think...Do you really think it would work?''

He shrugs. ''Why not? People do long distance relationships all the time. I can visit on her birthday and stay for Christmas and...and you can send me pictures and call me if either of you ever need anything and neither of us will have to be alone anymore. I can come back to you when all of this is over, Ruby. And...And then we can have it all. Please...''

She's quite certain he's about to break and quite frankly, it scares her so she does her best to stop it. ''Dean...'' She leans across her sleeping daughter to touch his cheek. He takes it a step further by kissing her gently. ''Dean, this...'' She whispers it against his lips and draws in a strangled breath when he tangles his hand in her hair. ''...It would be so hard.''

''Everything in life is hard, Ruby. But I can't just forget about you two. Not after today. I need to be in her life.''

''I get that,'' she murmurs. ''I do. But...''

''No. No buts,'' he pleads. ''Just say you'll do this with me. Just say we can _try_.''

She knows she shouldn't say it (she is not as strong as she likes to pretend she is and she's not sure she can handle this) but she loves him and he's looking at her like she's the sun and the moon and he is all she sees when she closes her eyes so she swallows, blinks away the tears and nods. ''Okay,'' she mumbles out. ''Okay, we can try.''

His eyes light up and she thinks it's beautiful. She lets out a choked laugh and kisses him again. (In the back of her mind, she knows this won't last long. She can already hear the ticking of an unseen clock counting down the time until it all ends.)

* * *

She falls asleep curled into Dean's side, feeling sated and happier than she has felt in a long time. Sometime near dawn, she feels the mattress shift as Dean crawls out of bed. She swears she hears a male voice saying his name for a second before she easily drifts back into slumber. Right before she falls asleep, she feels a paralyzing jolt of fear race through her body.

She wakes up as the sun is rising to an empty bed. Panicked, she bolts upright only to let out a breath of relief when she sees him standing at the foot of the bed. ''Dean...'' He doesn't react to the sound of her voice, standing there with his back to her and his hands on his hips. She's pretty sure this is it. She slides out of bed and puts her robe on. ''Dean...'' She hesitantly places a hand on his shoulder and he whirls around to face her. The look in his eyes scares her and when he grabs her by the arms, she gasps and jumps.

''You need to leave,'' he all but snarls at her and her eyes widen in shock.

She probably shouldn't be shocked, but she is. She hates that. ''W-What? This is my room.'' It's a weak argument. She hates that too. Normally, she'd punch him for snarling at her and grabbing her like that.

''I'm not just talking about the room or the apartment, Ruby. I'm talking about this town. You need to leave. Pack whatever you can, take Bray and just get the hell out.''

''But I don't understand. I thought - ''

''You thought wrong.''

''_You're _the one that begged me to - ''

''Then I was wrong!''

''Let go of me.'' She wriggles out of his grasp and backs away from him. ''And lower your voice,'' she adds in a hiss. ''Don't wake Bray.''

''Ruby - ''

''What the hell happened, Dean?'' She pleads. This time, she's the one who grabs his arm and he's the one who jerks out of her grip. ''You were fine when I went to sleep. You were happy. _We_ were _happy_. And now you're freaking out.'' She remembers the voice she thought she dreamed and a frown comes to rest on her lips. ''Dean, was...was someone here? Was someone in my home? What did they say to you?''

''Ruby, I don't have time for this!'' He grasps her wrists again and even when she struggles, she can't get free. ''You need to do this. Take her and leave. And stay the hell away from me. I mean it. Don't contact me. Don't wait for me. Just forget. Do you understand me?_ Forget_.''

''But you said - ''

''I know what I said!'' He pulls her closer to him almost painfully and smirks down at her. It's something ugly and sinister and not at all the Dean she knows. All at once she realizes what's happening. What he's doing. (Oh, he is _such_ a dumbass sometimes.) ''But you were stupid to believe me.'' He laughs cruelly and shoves her away from him. ''The only reason I even said those things is because of the kid. Ruby, you're a demon. Don't you think I have a little more self respect?''

She sighs patiently and looks up at him with a humorless smirk. ''So, this is your plan, huh? Get me to hate you so Bray and I are safe? And you think this will make it easier?'' She shakes her head. ''This is never going to be easy. You think I can't see right through you?'' The smirk drops off her lips and she puckers her lips into a half hearted pout. ''You don't have to do this, you know.''

''I don't love you,'' he says quietly. ''I don't even care about you. And Lila Bray? You really think I'm father material?'' He snorts. ''Please. You want to continue your, let's face it, kind of pathetic life? Stay_ away _from me.''

''Dean, just because you're scared,'' she brings a hand to his face. ''Doesn't mean you have to act like this.''

''Ruby,'' he takes her hand and squeezes too tightly. ''You mean nothing to me. Now, take _your_ daughter and stay far, far away from me and anyone close to me. Don't tell anyone she's mine. Don't even think about me.''

She folds her arms. ''You really mean that?''

He hesitates (which totally gives him away) and blinks slowly. ''If I say yes, will you hate me?''

''Yes.''

''Then yes. I mean it. I mean...all of it. You're nothing and I...I don't want you.''

Bray starts to cry as if on cue and after meeting his eyes briefly, Ruby reluctantly allows herself to leave the room even though she knows what will happen.

Sure enough, when she emerges from Bray's room with her daughter on her hip, she is just able to catch sight of him slipping out the front door. Somehow, in the two minutes she was gone, Dean has managed to both exit her life apparently for good and contradict everything he has just said by dropping his silver ring onto the coffee table. (Say what you want, that ring_ means something_.)

The ring is still spinning on the table and Bray, with her flushed rosy cheeks is still sniffling. Ruby sighs and picks up the ring. She knew it would end this way. That's what makes it so hard. She lied, by the way. When he asked her if she would hate him? She lied. He could stomp on her and break her down into nothing but she's never going to hate him like both of them wish she would.

(Two days later, she packs up her daughter and does exactly what Dean told her to do.)

**end part one**

**

* * *

**

**AN: Next up is their exciting travels around the world! Although I gotta say that I feel really sorry for Ruby. Traveling with a baby is _not_ fun. Traveling with _children_ is not fun. Trust me. Okay now a few things; Kristy? ****Aka the Fake Ruby? In the season four premiere when Dean and Sam reunitied, she was there and she actually **_**said **_**her name was Kristy. So I took that brief little scene and turned it into this. Also, I totally explained where Dean's silver ring went. I really miss that thing. I would like an actual explaination as to where it went. Unless I missed that.**

**Like I said, part two will be all about Ruby and Bray's exciting adventures and The Vampire Diaries will come into play. Yay, who's excited?**


	2. and sets me down

_AN: Okay, so I'm going to have to be a bad person and turn this twoshot into a threeshot. Also...the third part (which is the part with the Vampire Diaries crossover) won't be up until January. I'm so sorry! It's just that it was getting so long. I had to break it up again. Not to mention I'm leaving in three days and there is no way I'll be able to finish by then. I'm still working like a mad woman to get the next chapter of Queen of Hearts finished and posted before I leave. Plus I have to pack and...yeah, it's a whole big thing._

_In summary: The Damon part of this story will not be up until the new year because I am swamped and don't have a crapload of time left and for that I am truly sorry._

_However, I do hope you enjoy this part and I hope it quenches your thirst, so to speak, until I get back from my holidays. Love you all!_

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

* * *

**your words in my memory (are like music to me)**

_Written by Becks Rylynn_

* * *

**Part Two; **_and sets me down_

_

* * *

_

The funny thing is, she's always wanted to travel.

When she was human, she lived in a worthless little town in a worthless era of inequality and judgment. She was a measly little twerp who did everything a proper woman was _supposed_ to do back then, including taking regular beatings from her big brute of a husband. She was a scared, sad girl who couldn't make eye contact and who spoke with a stutter. Why do you think she turned to witchcraft in the first place? It was because she was tired of being meaningless and ordinary. She was tired of taking everything that was dished out onto her. She turned to witchcraft and wound up selling her soul because she wanted to get away to something better. And then, of course, she learned that the promises other witches had made her (namely Kristy) were nothing but words and then her life was nothing but flames.

The time after she crawled out of the pit was spent with the Winchesters. They meant something to the world and she knew she meant nothing, but she could help them. She could _save_ them. She never really saw the world that first year because she was too busy looking at them.

And then there was Bray.

She has always longed to see the world she has been deprived of for so long. However...

...Let's just say this isn't the way she pictured herself achieving her lifelong goal of seeing the world.

* * *

She's not sure what to do or where to go and she's fairly confident that traveling with an eight month old is going to be some variation of hell, but if she and her daughter were going to be in danger if they stayed then she'll do anything to keep that danger at bay.

On a whim, she decides to go to Paris. She's not exactly sure why but people always seem to want to go to Paris and she'd like to know what's there that is so special. Plus, as an added bonus it's so far away from Dean and everything they could have had that the distance is almost like a safety blanket. (Although, she will admit that long plane rides with a baby _suck_.)

Paris is beautiful in the summer.

It's crowded and busy and so hot it's oven-like, but it's beautiful.

She spends the time trying to outrun the memories of that one perfect day she had with Dean. (That, by the way, is a gigantic lie because if she really wanted to outrun Dean's ghost, she wouldn't keep his ring so close to her heart.) She can never run quite fast enough and the memories really get her at night.

She takes Bray to see the Eiffel Tower and tosses pennies into a fountain, making wishes that won't come true and drinks a lot of coffee.

It all sounds very glamorous, doesn't it? She's in fucking _Paris._

Unfortunately, the truth is Paris is a place full of romance and adventure and the best fashion in the world. Three things that she is not looking for. (Actually, the fashion part is not half bad.) She is a single mother trying to forget about the man who broke her heart. Paris was a mistake. It's expensive and full of things she can never have.

...Also, the language barrier is, like, hardcore and her life needs a laugh track when she tries to order coffee.

They stay for three weeks and then Ruby decides Paris does not have what she's looking for. (Of course it doesn't. What she's looking for is thousands and thousands of miles away trying to save the world.)

* * *

The plane from Paris takes her and Bray to Seattle and when she hears about a small, supposedly peaceful island off the coast, she jumps at the chance to get away somewhere where French people aren't talking loudly or kissing obnoxiously in front of her or cooing at her _petit mignon._

The second she steps onto the miniscule island, however, she knows she has made a terrible mistake. It's nice, yes. Peaceful and relaxing and a very nice summer vacation spot. But there is something awfully dark and sinister about this place and she's about 85% sure ghosts weave in and out of the trees. Something either has happened or will happen on this island. Possibly both. There's a startling amount of blood in the air.

The only reason she sticks it out for as long as she does it because Bray seems to like this place. They stay at a local in and Ruby does her best to forget about her trepidation. It's probably nothing anyway. Her senses must be out of whack because she hasn't needed them in so long. She pushes it all away and starts looking for a job and a place to live. All for Bray.

But the feelings she tries to ignore persist stubbornly and the trees that sway in the wind seem to whisper warnings to her. One afternoon, after she's put Bray down for a nap, she's struck by the unmistakable feeling that someone is watching her. She whirls around and when there's nothing there, she decides it's long past time to go. She actually throws her hands up in the air and announces to the empty room, ''That's it! I'm done.''

She doesn't sleep a wink that night and she takes her daughter and leaves first thing in the morning. The keeper of the inn smiles kindly, tells her they're going to miss her (lie. They're going to miss _Bray_ not her moody mother) but it's actually best that she leave because there's a wedding party coming soon and there wouldn't be room for her. Ruby half listens as the woman rambles on and all she can think about is how much she wants to leave.

''I know you like it here, baby girl,'' she says softly once they're gone. ''But there's something very wrong here.''

(Also, here more than anywhere else, she seems to get mistaken for someone else a lot and it's getting downright annoying.)

* * *

When they get back to the mainland, it's raining and she's tired so they stay the night in the city and the sound lulls Bray to sleep with ease. It's probably the best night's sleep they've both gotten in a long time. The rain even manages to chase dreams of Dean away.

The next day, Ruby gets a car and drives the 954 miles to Los Angeles in two days. Why she picks LA, she's not sure. She's not really a sun kind of person and Bray doesn't seem to be too overly fond of the big glowing ball either. It's not so much that she chooses LA. It's more...she gets tired of driving (because she is not a Winchester and she does not enjoy her time cooped up in a car) and LA just happens to be where she stops.

Despite the fact that the overload of sun repulses her, she wants to make this place last longer than a couple of weeks and she desperately needs a job because she's well on her way to running out of money. She gets a crappy apartment, finds a good daycare and gets a job at a bar. It's definitely not perfect and she quite misses her old life, but it's good enough for now.

(In LA, she gets so busy that she momentarily forgets about Dean.)

Aside from the neverending sunlight, LA is not a terrible place to be. Her job is decent and she makes good money, especially through tips, and Bray's happy with her daycare. Sure, their apartment is miniscule and sure she gets hit on repeatedly by guys _and_ girls (although it is nice to know she's still got it going on) but it's not actually half bad. And then one night, things change.

She's sleeping peacefully with the covers pushed off of her as sirens echo in the distance and then everything she thinks she's run away from catches up to her and Dean Winchester invades her dreams once again. She bolts upright in bed with a sharp gasp and sweat beading on her forehead. She draws in a few large gulps of air and clutches the sheets.

Okay.

Time to go.

The day after she gets her paycheck, she bundles Bray up and leaves LA, and the _stupid freaking sun that shines all the goddamned time, _behind.

* * *

Three days later, they're in a small town (she always has preferred small towns) in Ohio that she can't remember the name of. This place, she swears, will be different. She knows she can't stay forever but it needs to last longer than the other places. She gets a job at a local diner this time, a slightly better apartment and things begin to shape up. Her dreams of Dean disappear again and she allows herself to concentrate on everything but the war that's raging somewhere else and wills herself not to wonder if Dean and Sam are okay.

This place is actually pretty perfect (well, almost perfect). It's a nice family oriented small town where everyone knows each other. A good place to raise a child. The only problem with this town is her job. To put it bluntly, it sucks. The owner is a jackass who works his employees to the bone and she is not making nearly enough as she wants. She'd very much like to beat him with his own fucking spatula. She has several fantasies about maiming him with a frying pan. Unfortunately for her, she needs this job.

So she puts up with her boss (the sexist pig) and she still does her best to be a good mom even though she is always dead tired after work. She develops a routine and comes to enjoy the stability her predictable life entails.

Naturally, something has to come along and ruin what she's got going for her, right?

The life she left behind a long time ago comes back to haunt her (no pun intended) in mid October.

* * *

She first reads about the death of a well respected lawyer's wife in the paper, but she thinks nothing of it. People die every day and not every death is supernatural. However, when she goes to drop Bray off at daycare, she catches bits and pieces of a conversation being held between two women. Words like ''sudden'' and ''freak accident'' raise the red flags. She eavesdrops just long enough to learn that Mitchall Iverson's wife died suddenly at their home when she fell down the stairs.

Ruby sighs and chews on her lip. Logically, she knows it could actually be a simple freak accident. But when her internal alarm bells go off, they're usually right. To prove herself wrong, Ruby befriends one of the two women who happens to be Mitchall's daughter. Molly doesn't give her much to go on. Just to be sure, Ruby digs around in the Iverson's life. She's not totally convinced it's something weird yet and she's really hoping she's wrong. She's probably way off anyway. It's been a long time since she hunted anything. The last time she had a proper hunt was after Dean died but before she found out she was pregnant. She is way out of practice.

Of course just when she's happily ready to admit defeat, she comes face to face with what is possibly the freakiest looking ghost she has ever seen and winds up getting burned. That's not a...She's not being clever. She really does wind up burned. With one swipe of his charred hand, he leaves her with nasty burns on her stomach and a bad mood permanently ruining whatever she's got going for her in this town.

Seriously pissed off, she sifts through the Iverson's lives without an ounce of patience until she finds what she's looking for. Mr. Freddy Kruger's real name is Demetri Longiven and he died when Mitchall Iverson's law firm burned to the ground in early September.

The next day, when Molly's college aged sister dies in a car accident that no one can explain while on the way to her mother's funeral, everything clicks into place.

* * *

Ruby has never pretended to be tact. She is blunt and often times rude and she will not make apologies for that because that is just who she is. However, she does understand that her demeanor can, at times, be quite disconcerting to normal people. So she understands why Molly gets so upset and angry when Ruby plainly informs her that her life is in danger. She gets it, but she doesn't have time for it.

Molly tries to walk away (after rudely calling Ruby crazy, which is totally uncalled for by the way) and Ruby does just not have the time for this crap so she goes all out. ''Your mother and sister's deaths weren't accidents,'' she deadpans, crossing her arms.

Molly stops walking and turns around slowly. ''Excuse me?''

Ruby nods simply. ''They were killed. By a ghost. Who is now going to go after you and your family.''

Molly stares at her with wide, frightened eyes before laughing a shaky little laugh. ''You're insane. You need help.''

''Well, yeah, but that's not the point right now.''

''I-I'm calling the...'' Molly fumbles around in her purse for her phone.

When she finally grasps it, Ruby takes it and crushes it under the heel of her boot, which is not actually necessary but she doesn't like being called crazy. ''Molly - ''

''Stay away from me!''

''Molly, think about this for a second. When your mother died, did she have any burns on her body? How do you get a burn from falling down the stairs?''

Molly gulps. (Aha. Gotcha.) When Ruby takes a step forwards, Molly takes a step backwards, clutching the strap of her purse. ''Sh-She had a burn on her hand. Daddy said she had burned her hand on the stove the night before.''

''Daddy lied.''

Molly's eyes widen and fill with tears. For a second, Ruby's sure she's got her. But then Molly decides to be stubborn, shaking her head adamantly as she swipes at the fresh tears on her cheeks. ''No! This is...This is crazy! There's no such thing as ghosts.''

''Really?'' Ruby cocks her head to the side. ''Then who's that burned man you've been seeing around your house? New neighbor?''

Molly blanches. ''How do you know about that? That...That was a dream. It wasn't real.''

''I talked to one of your sister's friends. She saw him too. Before she died.''

A choked sob escapes Molly's lips and her hands go up to cover her mouth. ''Why are you telling me all of this?''

''Uh, because I'm trying to save your life,'' Ruby says slowly. ''Was that not clear? You have kids, Molly. They need their mother.'' When Molly doesn't speak and instead stares at the ground, Ruby continues. ''His name is Demetri Longiven. He used to work - ''

''For my father,'' Molly cuts in with a gasp. ''I know. I remember him. He...He died in that fire last month. But...'' She shakes her head and winds her arms around herself. ''Why would he do this? He was such a sweet man.''

Ruby hesitates briefly. She doesn't particularly want to present her findings to Molly because she will, no doubt, take it badly. But time is quickly running out and she doesn't think she has much of a choice anymore. ''Molly,'' she starts softly. ''The fire that Demetri died in...It wasn't an accident. Your father's law firm...it's not as pristine as you may think. Your father took money from criminals and I think Demetri found out and your father killed him to shut him up.''

As it turns out, Molly is a very sweet, caring mother and wife who just happens to deliver one hell of a bitch slap. ''I don't know who you think you are,'' Molly says shakily. ''But I want you to stay the hell away from my family.'' With a glare, she turns and walks away.

(In hindsight, Ruby doesn't know why she thought that would go over better.)

* * *

Molly is attacked later that night in her home and ends up with a nasty burn on her cheek, worse than the ones on Ruby's stomach, that will probably leave a permanent scar. But she's _alive_. When she turns around to face the person who saved her, Ruby sighs and pinches her lips.

* * *

Molly ends up banging on her father's door at one in the morning while Ruby hangs back with her phone to her ear as she talks the babysitter into staying late. As soon as the door opens, Molly's in tears and she's demanding, ''Is it true?''

Tired and haggard looking, all Mitchall can do is nod.

And the Molly puts her bitch slapping skills to good use. ''Mom and Meredith are dead because of you! How could you do something like this? I knew you were cold, but this is murder, Dad!''

''Hey,'' Ruby pushes in between father and daughter with an impatient frown. ''This is all very dramatic, but how about we all focus on staying alive, 'kay?''

* * *

Mitchall Iverson is an ungrateful bastard. It doesn't take long for Ruby to learn that key fact. He's also a little sexist if that ''how are_ you _going to save us? You're just a girl'' comment is showcasing his lovely personality.

''What are you doing? How is salt going to help us?''

''Salt repels evil.''

''...That's asinine.''

''Shut up.''

''You could stand to be a little nicer, young lady.''

''_Please_ shut up.''

''Haven't you ever heard of respecting your elders?''

Ruby smirks and stands straight, clapping her hands together to get rid of any leftover salt. ''I've got a lot of years on you, honey,'' she warns. ''But if you like, I can leave and let you and your daughter die. How does that sound?''

''I'm just saying - ''

''Well, don't. I don't have to be nice to you. What are you gonna do if I'm not? Set me on fire?''

''Just so you know,_ Dad_,'' Molly pipes up from a chair on the other side of the room. ''After this is all over, I'm turning you in.''

Ruby rolls her eyes when a bickering match starts and has to all but throw them both into the circle of salt. ''Hey,'' she snaps, glaring at them both. ''In case you haven't noticed, we're stuck in A Nightmare on Elm Street. I, for one, would love to skip to the end credits so I can go home to my kid. Unfortunately, I have to save what's left of your dysfunctional family first. Now, if you want to die in the first half hour of the movie then please, keep fighting. If you'd like to make it to the end, then shut the fuck up. Jesus, I've forgotten why I'm helping you both.''

* * *

Demetri attacks at two thirty in the morning.

A wall of fire separates Ruby from Molly and Mitchall and what winds up happening is this: All Demetri wants is revenge on the man who killed him. Mitchall gives him that by breaking the salt circle and sacrificing himself to the pyromaniac ghost to save his daughter. In the end, Molly's left kneeling by the charred body of her father who managed to gain some sort of twisted redemption that smells like burnt flesh and Ruby doesn't tell the other woman that from the moment she found out what Mitchall did she knew this would be the way it had to end.

The house burns to the ground and the rest of the town thinks the Iverson family just had a bad run of _terrible _luck.

* * *

Things pretty much go downhill from there. Ruby gets fired for neglecting her work and gets evicted shortly after. But she saved a life and she had forgotten how good that felt.

* * *

On Halloween night, Molly invites her over.

Ruby sits on the porch with Molly while Molly's husband takes his two kids and Bray trick or treating. Molly is watching her over the rim of her wine glass and Ruby doesn't waver under the scrutiny, crossing one leg over the other and sipping at her own wine. ''You're leaving,'' Molly says softly. ''Aren't you?''

Ruby puts her wine glass down and stares out at the trick or treaters in the night. ''Yes.''

''When?''

''Tomorrow morning. It's just...time. We've been here too long.''

Molly shakes her head and frowns. ''You've barely _been here _at all.''

''We've stayed in this place longer than anywhere else,'' Ruby argues quietly.

Molly tilts her head to the side. ''That sounds lonely. Why do you do it?''

''Because I have to. It's a long story, Molly.''

''Are you running from something?'' Ruby's lips twitch; she sends Molly a sidelong glance and doesn't say a word. Molly heaves a sigh and leans back against her chair. ''You have a lot of secrets, don't you, Ruby?''

''Well, if I told you then they wouldn't be secrets, now would they?''

Molly laughs lightly. They're quiet for a moment and then Molly puts her glass down and stares at Ruby with pursed lips. ''You should go to New York.''

Ruby arches an eyebrow. ''New York?''

''Mmmhmm.''

''Why?''

''It's a beautiful city. Especially at Christmas time. And I...I have a cousin who lives there. He knows the city like the back of his hand. He can get you a job and an affordable apartment. You saved my life, you know. I owe you.''

''Your father saved your life, Molly.''

''Ruby...''

Well...she has heard good things about New York at Christmas. She blows out a breath and turns to look at Molly. ''New York, huh?''

* * *

She gets to New York by November 3rd and Bray is already entranced by the lights of the city that shine brighter than even the LA lights.

Molly's cousin, Luke, is a very nice boy. When he's not hitting on her. He helps her find a suitable and cheap apartment in an area of the city that is not as terrible as some others, he helps her find a job (as a receptionist, which is new but the pay is better than all of her previous jobs put together) and he transfixes Bray by pulling a quarter out of her ear.

New York turns out to be a great change. In New York, she copes easily with her boss who is a perfectly nice man, he's just the _dullest_ man alive (she's pretty sure he even bores himself), she lives in an apartment without rats or cockroaches, she has time to spend with her daughter and she begins a flirtation with a cop who goes to the coffee place below her apartment.

(As an added bonus, Dean's ghost does not follow her to the city with the bright lights.)

* * *

In the most clichéd part of her life so far, she meets Danny De Luca when they bump into each other (literally) at the coffee house she has begun to frequent.

He is an incredibly attractive Italian cop with the body of one of those guys on the cover of a trashy romance novel and he's a total sweetheart. To top it all off, the second time they meet in the coffee house she has Bray on her hip and as it turns out, he's great with kids. (''I've got a lot of nieces and nephews,'' he says.)

They dance around each other every morning and she'll never admit it, but some part of her keeps waiting for Dean to cut into that dance with a cocky smirk and a _dude, my girls._

Danny finally asks her out two days before Thanksgiving and Ruby decides it's time to give up the ghost. She doesn't exactly say yes, but when he asks her if that was a no, she looks over her shoulder, sends him a smile and says, ''That wasn't a no, De Luca. Ask me again tomorrow.''

When he does ask her again the next day, she says yes. (It's time to move on.)

Thanksgiving finds her and Bray in that very same coffee place that never closes. Bray has food on her face and is passing the time by playing with a spoon and Ruby is reading. It doesn't strike her as sad because really, Thanksgiving is not one of the holidays she celebrates. She doesn't look up when the bell above the door chimes (she does, however, take the spoon away from Bray and replace it with a stuffed dog that Bray decides is best to chew on) but she does look up when someone says her name.

''Danny,'' she smiles (he makes her smile; that's got to count for something, right?) and closes her book. ''Hi.''

He grins and she thinks she might be ready to admit that his smile is gorgeous. ''Hi, Ruby. Are you here alone?''

She nods. ''Yeah. Bray and I got tired of reruns so we decided to get a little fresh air. You can sit down if you want. Otherwise the height difference might get us.''

He chuckles and takes a seat across from her. ''Anyway, what are you doing here?'' She asks, leaning an elbow on the table. ''Shouldn't you be with your family?''

''Nah. I've got a few hours before I have to head to Queens. What about you? Shouldn't you be with your family?''

''Uh...'' She smiles weakly and reaches over to brush a finger over Bray's cheek. ''This is pretty much it.''

He looks surprised, eyes darting between her and Bray. ''You don't have any family in the city?''

''Not in the city, no,'' she admits softly. (She sees Dean and Sam in her head even though she's not supposed to.) She looks at Bray, who's staring up at her with wide, innocent, searching eyes and when she looks back to Danny, he's frowning at her carefully and he looks like he's calculating something in his head. ''Uh-oh,'' she laughs. ''I recognize that look. You're going to do something charming, aren't you?''

He rises to his feet with a dazzling smile and holds out his hand to her. ''Come with me. Let me show you two my favourite parts of the city.''

''You mean like a date?''

''Think of it as more of a pre-date. Come on, nobody should be alone during the holidays.''

She pulls Bray out of her high chair and onto her lap, staring up at Danny for a moment in hesitation. And then she takes his hand.

* * *

She has a wonderful time with Danny, and when he touches her she feels those familiar tingles she hasn't felt in a long time. He takes her and Bray all around the city and charms her without effort. He shows her Central Park and Times Square and the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and it all happens so fast. The next thing she knows she's letting him take her to Queens as the sun goes down because he doesn't want her to be alone.

His family is big and loud and the women of the family barely seem to notice her, going straight for Bray with high pitched squeals instead. At the end of the night, she looks up from her conversation with two of his sisters and catches his eye with a smile. She's not sure what he means to her. But it's so nice not to be lonely anymore.

(New York was a good choice. She'll have to remember to thank Molly.)

* * *

Their official date is even better. It snows and she loves the snow and he makes her smile and laugh like someone _normal_ for a change. New York at night is beautiful, like he is. The lights cast the shadows away from her eyes and she sees the bright lights of the city reflected in his green eyes. He kisses her in the snow and the lights outside of her apartment building and she kisses back.

* * *

On their next date, he asks about Bray's dad. She just tells him that Bray's father isn't in the picture anymore. The truth is, Dean was never in the picture. But Danny...Danny could paint a whole different kind of picture.

* * *

Before she knows it, Bray's birthday arrives. Her baby girl is one year old. (God, has it really only been a year?) Bray is neither talking nor walking by the time her birthday rolls around because she's stubborn like both of her parents. Ruby of all people knows that the girl does not do anything unless she's good and ready. (She learned that during her three day stop and start labor.)

She spends the day pampering her daughter like a princess and when she takes a picture of Bray with cake on her face and a smile on her lips, she gives serious thought to sending Dean the picture. It's her birthday. He knows it's her birthday. And yeah, Ruby is well aware he told her not to contact him but this is their daughter's _birthday_ and he should...well, let's not get into the things he _should_ be doing for his daughter.

There's a knock on the door and she lets her fingers slip off the buttons of the cell phone. No. No contact means _no contact_. Whether it's her birthday or not.

She opens the door and it's Danny with an armload of presents from him and his family (who all think Bray is the greatest thing in the world. Seriously, they could go either way on Ruby, but Bray is like God's gift. ...She gets that) and there's that new picture she's letting him paint.

He cooks dinner and showers both Bray and Bray's mother with affection. (Danny is _perfect_. That's what she knows. What she doesn't know is if she deserves perfect.)

* * *

She falls asleep on the couch with Danny sometime after putting the birthday girl to bed and sometime during the Christmas special playing on TV. She wakes to the sound of Bray's cries as the credits are playing, slips out from underneath Danny's arm and staggers into her daughter's bedroom. She's not sure what's wrong with the poor girl - she doesn't need to be changed, she doesn't have a fever, she doesn't need to eat and she had been doing so well with sleeping through the night - but whatever it is, Bray is not in a good mood.

Ruby does her best to soothe Bray, but the one year old seems intent on being miserable. Bray does eventually wind up quieting down, but she clings to her mother like she's afraid to let go and lets out pitiful whimpers whenever Ruby tries to put her back in her bed. Ruby resigns herself to her fate and sits down in the chair by the window with Bray and her slightly disfigured (because Bray's a chewer) stuffed dog on her lap. Her eyes stray to the clock and when she sees what time it is, a small smile crosses her lips.

''You know, kid,'' she whispers. ''This time last year, I was screaming my lungs out because of you and your big head.'' Bray peers up at her mother with those big blue doe eyes of hers. Ruby stifles a laugh. ''Yeah, that's right. I said you have a big head. Don't worry, though. I love you and your big head.'' She presses a kiss to the top of the aforementioned big head before sighing and resting her cheek against Bray's. ''Do you think you could just stay this way forever? Can't you just be my little girl forever?'' Bray tangles her fingers in her mother's blond hair and clutches her dog.

After a moment of contented silence, Ruby speaks up softly, eyes darting to the door. ''You like Danny, don't you? He's perfect, you know. He's sweet and funny and he's got a great heart. And he _really_ likes you. Everybody likes you. He'd be so good to us, Bray.''

(Yes, true. But there's a silver ring and a memory locked away somewhere that says differently.)

''He'd treat us right.'' Ruby swallows and closes her eyes. ''He's a great guy, baby. But I feel like he can't ever really know who I am. But your dad...he knew...he _knows_ me. He knows every corner, every secret, every weakness.''

The truth is, she mapped out a path to her heart a long time ago and lined the road with bitterness and walls and traps. So far the only one who has ever been able to chase away the bitterness, break through the walls and sidestep the traps, was Dean. With a sigh, she pulls her phone out of her pocket because she doesn't know what else to do and she brings up the one picture she has of Dean and Bray, taken on that one perfect day she can't forget no matter how hard she tries. ''You remember him?'' She asks quietly. ''That's dad.''

...It should be surprising to her that even though she's the one who has been here every step of the way and all Dean did was spend one day buying her presents, Bray still manages to grab for the phone and say _dad_ as her first word. Actually, it's more ''da'' but Ruby knows what she's trying to say. That should be like a knife in her heart, shouldn't it? But all she does is let out a choked little laugh and nod. ''Yeah, Bray,'' she sighs tiredly. ''That's your dad. And he loves you so much. ...I'll bet he misses you.'' She glances at the clock, bites her lip and then decides to fuck it. ''You know what?'' She brings up a different picture and before she can stop herself, she sends Dean the picture of their daughter on her birthday because goddamn it, he's her father and he deserves a fucking picture of his daughter on her birthday.

She looks at the clock and purses her lips.

10:43.

''Happy birthday, baby.''

* * *

(Somewhere far away, Dean has just stormed out of a motel room and into the falling snow because he is in a seriously terrible, awful, no good mood (has been all day) and he can't tell anyone why.

FYI, Dean, pretending your daughter doesn't exist doesn't make that raw, aching, infected,_ bloody _hole in your chest go away.

He has a plan. He does. And it's a good plan. He's going to drink and drink until he can't remember how to care whether or not he's crying. However, instead, his phone buzzes before he can even get to his fucking car and when he sees that picture of the prettiest girl in the world, he lasts about 1.5 seconds before he begins to splinter and chip away.

Sam finds him. Of _course_ Sam finds him. Sam finds him on his knees in the falling snow with a hand over his face and his cell phone held limply in his hand. ''Dean?'' Sam speaks softly, crouching down in front of his brother. ''Dean...'' When he gets nothing in response, he takes the phone, looks at the picture and he _understands_ the terrible mood and the odd, unexplainable pleas for forgiveness Dean utters in his sleep. Eyes still fixated on that familiar smile and those frighteningly familiar eyes, he wraps his hand around the pulse point of Dean's wrist in some sort of silent way of comfort. In return, Dean wraps his hand around Sam's arm and even his touch seems to beg for something he can't have. ''Oh,'' Sam whispers, the sound of his brother's ragged breathing breaking the silence of the snow. ''_Dean_.''

_Yeah._)

* * *

She's trying with Danny. She's trying so hard. But she thinks she might already know how this story will end. And then...

...A curveball.

* * *

A few days after Bray's birthday, on the 15th of December, Danny gets shot. It's not too serious and he'll live, but it scares her more than she thought it would. She cares for this man, she realizes as she's sitting by his hospital bed watching him sleep. She doesn't want to lose him; but she's not sure she wants to keep him either. The path to her heart has always been long and twisty and dark, after all.

* * *

New York really is breathtaking at Christmas time. Magical, even. Something about it seems to quiet the rush of the city. Christmas comes quickly and she spends it with Danny and his family because they think it's _just terrible_ for her to spend it alone.

Bray stares in wonder and awe at the lights and the sounds and all things Christmas, and Danny smiles, and Ruby...can't find her footing in all of this mess.

* * *

In the time she has spent alone, she has become quite an avid reader. Mostly because when she's not working or being a mom or a girlfriend now, what the fuck else is there to do? At her office Christmas party (which she had been forced to go to), one of the other secretaries recommends an author who ''blew her mind'' and after Christmas, she's bored so she looks him up. Big fucking mistake.

She reads something she shouldn't and finds that the words she reads are the difference between moving on and telling lies to yourself.

_''Two brothers: one of them wants to take you apart. Two brothers: one of them wants to put you back together.''_

Her breath catches.

* * *

Dean catches up to her that night in her dreams and words float in and out, haunting her subconscious to tell her exactly what she's doing wrong here.

_''You're in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won't tell you that he loves you, but he loves you. And you feel like you've done something terrible, like robbed a liquor store, or swallowed pills, or shoveled yourself a grave in the dirt, and you're tired. You're in a car with a beautiful boy, and you're trying not to tell him that you love him, and you're trying to choke down the feeling, and you're trembling, but he reaches over and he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your heart taking root in your body, like you've discovered something you didn't even have a name for.''_

She wakes with curses on her lips and sweat on her forehead and the lies she's told come crashing and smashing down around her. Well, fuck. No, seriously. Fuck this shit, she's so screwed. _That's _what does it? _That's_ the final straw? Printed words? Fuck, Ruby, you're getting so soft in your old age.

Damn you, Richard Siken. (She swears if she ever runs into that stupid, stupid man she's going to break his arm for making her realize that living this way isn't fair to anyone. She had been perfectly content with pretending.)

* * *

She breaks up with Danny the day after New Year's, which is a bitchy thing to do but she needs out before she drowns.

He takes it ...surprisingly well. He doesn't yell or beg and he lets her talk. When it's all over and she tells him she's going to be leaving New York, he gives her a half hearted smile and tells her earnestly, ''I hope you find what you're looking for.''

She smiles sadly and doesn't tell him that won't happen. He kisses her one last time before he leaves, tells her he could have loved her and asks if she could have loved him. When she sighs, he puts a finger to her lips. ''Don't answer that.''

And then he kisses her forehead and leaves.

* * *

The lights of New York are lovely and Danny is wonderful, but he's not what she wants. You have no idea how much she wishes he was.

(You see, Danny has warm green eyes, a beautiful smile, he adores Bray and he jumped in front of a bullet to save a twelve year old boy like a hero who acts on instinct and adrenaline. Do you see who she's trying to replace?)

* * *

Yes, New York was a nice change. But it's just not where she belongs. She and Bray (who has finally started walking and now hates the car because it just means time she can't spend tottering all over the place and getting in trouble) spend about a weak traveling and driving and avoiding solid ground. And then...

...Well, then there's Virginia.

**end part two**

**

* * *

**

**AN: Let me start off by saying that the excerpts from what Ruby read is part of a story/poem/piece of genius called _You Are Jeff _by Richard Siken. Who is awesome. And earlier in the story there was a mention of how when they were in Paris people kept calling Bray _petit mignon. _Rough translation: Little cutie.**

**Okay! I hope that was good enough to tide you over until early 2011! Happy Holidays, everyone! And Happy New Year!**


	3. in your warm arms

_AN: There comes a point in every author's life where they look at a oneshot turned twoshot turned threeshot and say...fuck it, this little bitch is a multi-chapter. Which is my way of saying this isn't the last chapter. Although it does begin the Vampire Diaries crossover. So enjoy!_

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

* * *

**your words in my memory (are like music to me)**

_Written by Becks Rylynn_

* * *

**Part Three;**_ in your warm arms_

_

* * *

_

She doesn't plan on staying in Mystic Falls, Virginia. She certainly doesn't plan on stumbling into the realm of the town's biggest kept secrets. Mystic Falls and everything (every_one_) that comes with it is totally and completely unplanned.

Her car breaks down just outside of the small town and back at the garage, the mechanic (as he wipes his calloused, rough looking hands off on an oil rag, she has a flashback to a few days before Dean died and everything fell to pieces, when he was working on his car and she was perched on a lawn chair with sunglasses over her eyes and Sam sitting next to her while none of them said a word. It's probably one of the best memories from their entire relationship, and isn't that just fucking depressing?) tells her she's going to have to wait until the next day to get out of town. So it's not really that she plans on staying in Mystic Falls, it's more that she is thrown into the place without her bearings.

She gets a room at the local Bed & Breakfast for the night and worries infinitely when the owner, Mrs. Flowers, insists on carrying their bags up the stairs because she's got to be at least in her eighties. Bored out of her mind and hungry, she makes what is possibly one of the most life changing decisions she has ever made. She decides to take Bray out for lunch at a local restaurant (named The Grill. What an original name).

A boy opens the door for her with a kind smile and a nod. He can't be much older than seventeen and yet there's something decidedly wise about him. Something that tells her he's wise beyond his years. With his dark eyes and his soft, reserved smile, he reminds her very much of someone she used to know. (No, not Dean. The other one.) She offers him a rushed smile at his act of kindness (not many boys his age are that kind, she has come to learn) but when he moves past her, his arm brushes hers and a jolt of electricity runs through her like a current. She gasps in shock and a step ahead of her, she watches him stop in his tracks.

He turns his head slightly, not enough to face her and when she realizes she's still standing there staring at him, she quickly hurries away from him, clutching her daughter just a little bit closer to her body.

Here's the thing: Demons have always been able to sense someone a little less than human. Ruby is no exception. And Golden Boy over there? He's definitely less than human.

(How _does_ she manage to get herself into these situations?)

* * *

Halfway through their meal, Bray is chatting away happily to anyone who passes their table and Ruby is spending her time continuously casting suspicious glances in the direction of Mr. Mysterious. Whoever (or whatever) he may be. He joins a young dark haired girl about his age (who is most certainly human, Ruby can tell that just by the tired look in the girl's eyes) and they share a few lovey dovey, vomit inducing, Buffy/Angel looks in the midst of their Very Serious Conversation.

Honestly, Ruby has no idea what he is or what he could be. He looks human, he acts human...Is it possible her senses may be off? No, that can't be it. He's not a demon. She can tell that right away. (Demons can sense other demons from a mile away. The air gets heavier, there is a scent that flows through the wind, your pulse speeds up. It's a fairly animal-like quality, but in all truth, Ruby knows better than anyone that all demons are is animals.) Maybe he's a werewolf? Shapeshifter perhaps?

She looks away from them and back to Bray, smiling softly for her daughter as she leans over to tenderly wipe away a smudge of food from the girl's cheek. ''Don't you worry,'' she murmurs. ''We're going to get out of here as soon as we can, baby girl.''

When she looks back up and towards the object of her scrutiny, her breath catches in her throat and she has to swallow. There is a new person standing next to their table, gazing down at the strange boy with a drink in his hand and a smirk on his lips. He's older, slightly, and something about the way he's looking at the younger one reminds her of...something from her past that she can't quite put her finger - oh. When the older one laughs and tilts his glass to his lips, the younger one seems to sigh and flick his eyes to the ceiling briefly. Ah, right. Of course. They're brothers. Probably should have gathered that from the familiar shape of their jaws.

Ruby cannot hear a word of what they're saying, but she knows they're talking about her. (She _knows_ she's not the only one who felt that jolt.) New Guy looks up, revealing striking eyes that meet hers and she looks away. A moment later, when she finally allows herself to look back, Tall, Dark and Striking is gone and Young and Broody is back in deep conversation with Weary Human Girl, reaching across the table to take her hand. Oh, young love. (Ick.)

With a tired sigh, Ruby turns her attention back to Bray, who now has no one to talk to since the table of teenage girls, who spent most of their meal cooing at her, is gone. Ruby grimaces when she sees that familiar pout on her daughter's lips. It's the same pout Dean showcases right before he loses it completely and punches the wall. It's temper tantrum time. ''Now, I know that look, kid,'' Ruby says calmly as she pulls Bray out of her seat and onto her lap. ''You're about to get Winchester cranky and loud.''

Bray squirms like she's reached the stage where she is endlessly embarrassed of her mother earlier than expected and decides now is the best time to make use of her new favourite word. ''No!'' _Awesome._ ''No!''

''Lila Bray Winchester, please do not start this.''

''No!''

''Yes, right. Exactly. No being a brat.'' Ruby scans the room for a waitress, in desperate need of the check (also, someone is staring at her and it is way beyond unnerving) and comes up empty. ...Does anyone actually work here besides the teenage boy with the puppy dog eyes gathering dishes and flinging looks in Weary Human Girl's direction? Seriously, what has she gotten herself into? Dark Shadows meets The OC?

Bray's hand comes up to yank at her mother's hair quite rudely and she lets out a huff when Ruby gently untangles the tiny fist from her hair. In anger, Bray's hand falls to the table, catches a spoon and it clatters to the ground. Ruby bites her lip, but before she can make a grab for it, someone beats her to it. When she looks up, she finds herself staring straight at the brunette girl who is friends with the inhuman version of Dean and Sam. The girl smiles, but it seems a little hesitant as she hands the piece of cutlery back to the flustered young mother. Ruby pauses briefly before she allows herself to breathe out a, ''Thanks.''

''She's beautiful,'' the girl says with a smile, shifting her gaze to Bray. ''Is she yours?''

''She is.''

''How old?''

Ruby wills herself not to frown and look over her shoulder to see which one of them is watching this. ''She just turned one in December,'' she says at last. To sell her clueless act even further, she smiles and fakes a laugh. ''And she's getting more and more like her dad every day.'' _Unfortunately._

The girl smiles and stands there awkwardly for a minute and then her eyes dart over Ruby's shoulder. She swallows. Wow. She is really not good at this, is she? Ruby almost feels sorry for the poor human. ''So, are you new in town?''

Ruby sighs impatiently and rises to her feet, holding Bray to her chest protectively despite the fact that Bray does not want to be held at all right now. ''Okay, listen, little girl,'' she snaps. ''We both know what you're trying to do here, all right? So why don't you do us all a big favor, cut the crap and just hurry up and ask me.''

The brunette shuffles from foot to foot and can't look Ruby in the eye. ''Ask you what?''

''Ask me what I am.''

The girl's eyes widen and she takes a step away.

Ruby just feels like she does not have time for this shit. ''I'm not stupid, you know. I'm perfectly aware that your less than human friends sent you over here to play covert operative. And just so you know, honey, you are_ really _bad at it. You most definitely do not have a career ahead of you as a Bond girl. Maybe just stick to looking pretty.''

Her words seem to strike a chord in the girl because suddenly she doesn't seem so meek and there's fire in her eyes. ''What are you?'' She asks bravely. ''What are you doing here?''

''Look,'' Ruby bounces the increasingly cranky Bray on hip, a mess of puffy winter jacket adding at least a pound to the growing toddler's weight. ''I don't know who you are and frankly, I don't care. I'm not here because I want to hurt anyone. I'm not a super villain, okay? My car broke down and my kid is tired of being cooped up in a car. I assure you, I'll be gone by tomorrow.''

Without waiting for a response from Little Miss Nancy Drew, Ruby brushes past her and decides this town is something akin to poison and she needs to leave. Now.

(When she finally flags down a busy looking waitress, she is told her meal has already been paid for by someone named Damon Salvatore. She turns and Tall, Dark and Striking grins and tips his glass to her. Her heart beats in her throat.)

* * *

Ruby clicks off the bathroom light, stifling a yawn as she tucks a loose strand of hair behind her ear. In the portable crib she is quickly outgrowing, Bray is sleeping peacefully with her blanket cuddled into her. Ruby smiles a tired smile and bends to gently brush hair out of her daughter's closed eyes. That's when she feels a cold, frigid January breeze hit her back. She whirls around, narrowing her eyes at the sight of the open window, curtains blowing in the wind. She tenses and angles her body towards Bray. She never opened that window.

Taking a risk, she turns her back on the open window to check on Bray. That's a mistake. There's a blast of icy air that blows her hair into her face and the next thing she knows, there's a strong (too strong) hand clamping around her wrist. She is yanked into a cold body before she has a chance to react and her attacker lets go of her wrist, loops an arm around her waist to keep her against him and claps a hand over her mouth to stifle her surprised yelp.

Now, she _has_ been here before. But not since Bray. There is a strong, inhuman man holding her against him with unnatural strength and her daughter is fast asleep in her crib not even a foot away. Ruby doesn't know her attacker (actually, she has a pretty darn good idea of who it is), she can't calculate what he'll do next. All she knows is that he is strong and dangerous and he is in the same room as her daughter.

''Don't scream,'' he whispers in her ear. The amount of terror that sweeps over her at the knowledge that he could hurt her daughter if she doesn't comply is huge so she nods. He eases up his grip on her and begins to draw her away from him. Just when she thinks he's going to let her go, he whips her around, grasps her wrists and in a total unsurprising turn of events she finds herself looking at Tall, Dark and Striking. Otherwise known as The Mysterious Damon Salvatore. He locks eyes with her (which is more than a little disconcerting) and his voice is again quiet with a certain level of authority when he orders her to, ''Tell me what you are.''

For a brief, painful second, she literally has to fight with herself to keep her secrets from spilling out of her mouth and she doesn't know _why. _That's when it all catches up to her. The cool touch, the deep stare, the lingering smell of dirt and blood (and is that bourbon?) and the definitive air of danger that surrounds him. Mr. Blue Eyes here is a bloodsucker. She shakes off his attempt at compulsion with ease and the corners of her lips curve upwards. ''You can't compel me,'' she informs him plainly. ''It won't work on me.''

His jaw tightens. ''I don't know what you're...'' He trails off, tilts his head to the side and frowns. ''Why not?''

She shrugs, wrenches free of his grasp and in less than a second, she has him on the floor and she's straddling him. ''Because I'm special.''

He chokes back a laugh. ''You're lying. You're wearing vervain.''

''Nope.''

''Well,'' he says. ''You're strong. So I'm going to take a shot in the dark here and say you're...Buffy's long lost twin sister.''

''Sure. You wanna go with that? I can work with that.''

He sneers, kicks her off of him and rolls on top of her, wrapping a hand around her throat and squeezing. ''Let's go with the truth.''

''The truth?'' She gasps out. In an attempt to stop this fucking stupidity, she decides to fuck it. He wants the truth? She'll give him the fucking truth. ''You got it, fangs.'' She closes her eyes briefly and when she opens them, they're as black as oil puddles and she can feel that old familiar power running through her veins like an old friend. He loosens his grip on her and it's enough for her to gain the upper hand. With ease, she uses her free hand to send a right hook to his face and then she kicks him off of her. Either he's surprised, or she really is that strong because he crashes backwards into the end table. The lamp crashes to the ground and shatters. Almost instantly, Bray lets out a frightened wail and - naturally - a cry of one of the only words she knows. ''No!''

''Great,'' Ruby bites out. ''Thanks for that.'' She lets her eyes fall back to blue, sends one last look at the stunned (and slightly impressed?) vampire on the ground and then she makes a beeline for her daughter. She shushes Bray gently, apologizes for scaring her and assures her that everything is all right. However, Bray, the little genius, doesn't exactly seem to believe her discombobulated mother. She clings to her shoulder and continues to mumble groggy whispers of ''no'' into Ruby's shoulder. Ruby cradles her against her chest and takes an instinctive step backwards when he moves towards her.

''What are you?'' He snarls out. ''Why are you here?''

She frowns. ''You don't...know what I am?'' When he presses his lips together and narrows his eyes, she realizes he has no idea what she is. Arching an eyebrow, she studies him for a moment and decides it's not all that hard to figure out what she's looking at. He's got enough confidence in his eyes and his stance to tell her that he's not a young vampire, but hidden somewhere in that confidence is a certain recklessness and cockiness that tells her while he thinks he might know everything...he definitely doesn't. She smirks at him bravely. ''You have no idea what's out there, do you?''

His eyes harden and in a flash, he's behind her breathing down her neck.

''Remember,'' she warns. ''I can take you.'' She dances away from him with an effortless grin, rubbing her daughter's back. ''I'm older, I'm stronger, I'm wiser and I'm a mom. Never mess with a mom.''

''I've heard that, actually.''

Bray pulls away from her mom's shoulder, eyes the strange man with the pretty eyes staring at them and then makes use of the other word she knows. ''Hi.''

It seems to throw him for a loop. He blinks, looks at the little girl, opens his mouth to speak and no words come out. Finally, he clears his throat and nods. ''Hello.''

''Hi!''

''Look,'' she purses her lips and takes a breath, meeting his eyes. ''You want the truth? We're passing through. My car broke down and it's in the shop. We'll be out of here by tomorrow and you and your vampire cronies can go back to whatever diabolical plan I'm sure you have. I am not here to screw things up for you, I can promise you that.''

''You expect me to believe that story?'' He asks coldly. ''Your car broke down? Listen, I believe in a lot of things but I don't believe in coincidences.''

''Believe me or don't. That's the truth. I don't know how I wind up in these kinds of situations, I just do.''

He crosses his arms, leans against the wall and stares at her without blinking for an unnerving amount of time. ''You're a brave little thing,'' he says finally. ''Strong too.'' His eyes flicker with passion and rage and arrogance, three things all vampires are bursting with and he pushes off the wall. ''But you're clearly underestimating me. I could kill you in a second. I could do it right now.''

''You don't even know what I am,'' she argues.

''Why don't you tell me?''

She presses her lips together and shakes her head. He laughs a hearty laugh that sends odd feeling shivers up and down her spine. ''Do it,'' she challenges, locking eyes with him. ''Go ahead, fangs. Kill me. Rip my heart out in front of my daughter. Show me what kind of monster you really are.'' It may seem like a very stupid thing to do, challenging him like this. But she sees something in his eyes (something that she's not even sure he's aware of) that makes her feel...safe. Or at least safer than she should feel around a vampire. She's not so sure how she feels about that.

He looks at her, then at Bray, and then his jaw tightens. ''You'll leave.'' He says it like an order, not a question as he begins to back towards the window. ''You'll leave and never come back.''

''Whatever this town is,'' she says, ''it's not my problem.'' For a fraction of a second, she looks down at Bray to make sure she's still doing okay and when she looks up, he's gone and the curtains are swaying in the sudden breeze.

* * *

The next day, she gets her daughter into the car and drives.

She has just left Mystic Falls when she is suddenly hit with a wave of guilt. What if those two vampires rip that town apart? Can she live with that? If she does nothing and they slaughter the town, will she be able to live with the knowledge that she could have done something? It is not often that she wishes she could care less and be more like the others. However, this is one of those rare moments where she thinks not caring might make some aspects of her life a little bit easier. (Then again, caring about someone is how she got her daughter and her daughter is the one thing she would never give up.)

With a sigh and a stifled profanity, she turns the car around.

* * *

It's not hard to track down where they live. The younger one with the neverending sad eyes opens the door and swallows when he sees her.

''I'm not a hero,'' she says plainly. ''I don't pretend to be. I'm a mom. I leave the heroics for my daughter's father. But I need to know that despite what you are and despite what your basic animal instincts are that you're not going to tear this town apart.''

He looks at her for a long time and then offers her a small smile, stepping aside with a quiet, ''Why don't you come inside?''

* * *

In Mystic Falls, Virginia, there is a band of Merry Misfits that like to pretend they're superheroes. Damon, Stefan, Caroline and Elena are the ones Ruby is currently entangling herself with. God knows why she's putting herself in this position.

Caroline squeals, ''Oooh, baby!'' when she sees Bray and claps her hands together. Less than two seconds later, Bray is happily showing off to Caroline and in return, Caroline is eating it all up. The girl is seventeen forever and looks pale in the sunshine, but she's harmless. (Besides, Ruby makes sure to stand close enough to Caroline so that if something does happen, she can reach over and rip out Barbie's spinal cord if need be.)

Stefan looks harmless with his soft, gentle eyes and his thoughtful frown but there are shadows he can't control lurking in his eyes. There is something very sad about that.

Elena is young and human, but she looks tired and she frowns much too much and Ruby so badly wants to teach the girl the dangers of premature wrinkles.

And then there's Damon. And Damon's like a thunderstorm. Loud, a little frightening and pretty to look at. (Some might say the same thing about her.)

''I always thought demons were a myth,'' Stefan says carefully, eyeing her warily.

Ruby shrugs. ''Well, you thought wrong. Did you also think there was only one type of vampire?''

Damon hums thoughtfully and tips his glass to his lips. ''I knew that one.''

''Feel proud,'' she tells him. Everyone else looks at her with open mouths and wide eyes. She sighs. ''Seriously?''

''There are other kinds of vampires?'' Caroline asks incredulously.

Ruby shrugs. ''Sure. Just like there are different races of humans, there are different races of vampires.''

''Please tell me none of them sparkle,'' Elena deadpans.

Ruby blinks. ''What?''

''It's from Twilight,'' Stefan supplies.

''I don't know what that is.''

''Lucky you,'' Damon grumbles.

''There's your kind of vampire. Aversion to sunlight and vervain, stake through the heart to kill. And then there are the others. Sunlight can't kill them, neither can wooden stakes. To kill them you have to chop off their heads. They're much stronger than your kind,'' she states bluntly. ''But they're a dying breed. There are much more of you out there.'' She smirks and Bray toddles over to her mother to show her the pen she has stolen off the table. ''You have a lot to learn, don't you, Mystery Inc?''

''Oh,'' Caroline smiles and presses her hands together. ''I get to be Daphne.''

There's a moment of silence and then Damon takes a step towards her and grins from ear to ear. In a complete 180 from the previous night, he towers over her, meets her eyes and says, ''Why don't you stick around then? Teach us a little something?''

She peers up at him curiously and spots the intrigue in his eyes with ease. It's like a light. He finds her fascinating. ''You're flirting with me.''

''A little.''

''Why, you're not much of a monster at all, are you, Mr. Salvatore? You're just a man.''

When his grin fades, she laughs. ''There are three people in this room who would vehemently disagree with you,'' he says quietly.

She tilts her head to the side and lifts Bray onto her hip. ''They must not look at you like I do.''

(This is...going to be something completely different, isn't it?)

* * *

(When she is gone, Damon stares after her like he is completely enthralled in her every graceful movement. ''She's a hurricane, isn't she?''

Stefan stands and comes to stand next to his brother. ''Most definitely.''

''She's like a mix of Katherine and Elena,'' Caroline says and then sighs. ''People must fall in love with her so easily.''

Damon smiles into his bourbon. You know, sometimes hurricanes can be lovely. Like they're made of magic. Yes, he has always enjoyed hurricanes just a little bit too much.)

* * *

They stay.

They stay because she's not sure if she trusts them and she doesn't want people to get hurt. Becoming a mother has softened her. She _cares _about things now. Bray seems to like it. There are people here who adore the precious little girl (namely Caroline) and Bray seems to...adore being adored. A lot like her father. (God, she's going to be an annoying teenager.)

Within the first week, she meets countless people who surround the Salvatore brothers. From Tyler the werewolf, who whistles at her and calls her a MILF but eyes Caroline like she's all he sees, to Bonnie, who frowns with slightly judgmental eyes, therefore earning herself a position on Ruby's shit list, to Jenna and Alaric (''call me Ric''), who are not teenagers. Thank fucking God for that. She can't handle all of these teenage hormones flying around.

More importantly, within the first week, she learns she has three vampires watching her back. (She's not sure whether to be frightened or flattered.)

Oh, Lord. What has she gone and gotten herself into this time?

* * *

Damon Salvatore has a lot of classic Italian charm bottled up inside of that bad boy persona. One would think that might have died out a long time ago. Then again, in her past life Ruby was what one would call a Southern Belle and occasionally, something still manages to slip through. (Dean used to love it when she called him _darlin' _usually after sex.)

She runs into Damon an awful lot that first week. So much that she's 99.9% sure none of it is a coincidence. One day, she's out with Bray when the little girl (who loves colors and pretty girly things) insists they go into a flower shop. Ruby humors her daughter and takes the girl inside to see the flowers. While Bray, stumbling along with her hand in Ruby's, fawns over the flowers, Ruby looks up and spots Ole' Blue Eyes Salvatore himself. In a flower shop. In the middle of January. Coincidence? She thinks not. ''You're stalking me,'' she deadpans when he casually strolls up to her.

''Yep.'' He throws an arm around her shoulder. ''Don't act like you don't love it.''

''Why me?''

He shrugs. ''I don't know. Boredom, I guess.''

''Hi!''

Damon switches his focus from Ruby to Bray, beaming down at her with ease. ''Well, hello down there, Bray. You look lovely today. How've you been?'' Bray pauses for a moment and then points at the pretty red roses with a smile. Damon nods his approval. ''Very nice. Love the color.''

''Yeah, because it's the color of blood,'' Ruby mutters under her breath.

''Exactly.'' Damon shoots her a cocky smirk and then clears his throat, eyeing Bray for a moment before turning away. ''You know what I like?'' Despite the fact that he's having a very one sided conversation with a one year old, Damon speaks to Bray like she's an old friend as he crosses the room to pluck a single flower from a display. ''This is an amaryllis,'' he informs the girl as if she really cares. ''Roses are fine for Valentine's Day and making up, but this is a flower. It means splendid beauty, you know,'' his eyes slide to Ruby for a second. ''I think that's very fitting, don't you?''

Bray enthusiastically agrees in the form of a giggle. Ruby sighs. She can only watch as he picks up an entire bouquet of amaryllises and strides over to the woman at the cash register who is looking at him like she wants to have his babies. Ruby picks up Bray and looks at her closely. ''Is he flirting with me or you?''

When he approaches them, she licks her lips. For reasons unknown to her, he makes her very nervous. And not in an extremely bad way. ''Here you go.'' Damon smiles widely as he hands the transfixed toddler a beautiful red flower. ''A beautiful flower for a beautiful lady.'' Bray giggles even though she has no idea what that means and Ruby wants to roll her eyes. When Damon looks at Ruby, however, his eyes are just a little bit darker (with something that looks a hell of a lot like lust) and she sucks in a breath. ''For you, Buffy,'' he says, presenting her the rest of the flowers.

Somehow, she manages a smirk as she accepts the arrangement. ''You're mighty suave, aren't you?''

He chuckles. ''Wait until I start speaking Italian. You'll melt. They always do.'' He winks. ''_Ciao, bella_,'' and then he turns and disappears.

Ruby lets out a breath. ''My, oh, my, Bray. We are in for a world of trouble with that man, aren't we?''

In response, Bray looks at her mother, waits a moment and then takes a bite out of her flower.

* * *

He's right, you know.

Damon Salvatore speaking Italian should be illegal because when he does, there is a whole bunch of twisty feelings inside of her that aren't bad (not bad at all) but rather entirely distracting. The first time it happens, she's at The Grill (she still thinks it should have a proper name, by the way) having dinner with Bray when Damon takes a seat next to her, shows off his pearly whites and his distracting eyes and says, _''Posso offriti qualcosa da bere?'' _She gapes at him several seconds before he laughs and singsongs, ''I told you so.'' Then he sends her a sidelong glance and scoots closer to her. ''So...can I?''

Still slightly dazed (oh, calm down, you're embarrassing yourself) and stunned, she clears her throat and looks away. ''Can you what?''

''Buy you a drink. Can I?''

(She says okay. Damn Italian.)

* * *

The second time it happens, she's been pulled into the Salvatore Boarding House by Stefan and Elena, who fear that there is another vampire of unknown origin in Mystic Falls and since she's the only one with experience dealing with the other species of vampires, she is dragged into their rag-tag meeting.

When Damon sees her, his first reaction is to whistle and say, _''Ciao, _Buffy, _fa cosi caldo qui o e la tua presenza?''_

Bonnie, Caroline and Elena all turn their attention from Bray (what is it with teenage girls and babies?) to Damon and it is not lost on Ruby that out of all of them, Elena looks like she's the one most likely to dissolve right then and there. Ruby is surprised by how much she doesn't like that. ''I don't know what you just said,'' she monotones.

''He said 'is it hot in here, or is it just you?' '' Stefan translates dryly.

''But,'' she continues. ''You're going to need to stop doing that.''

Damon laughs. ''Go out with me.''

''Excuse me?''

''Go out to dinner with me and I'll stop.''

''Do you even eat?'' She fights back, trying to appear nonchalant.

He rolls his eyes and throws himself down onto the couch next to Bray and Caroline. Babbling cheerily, Bray climbs off Caroline's lap and onto his. ''What am I? A savage? Of course I eat. Come on, go out with me. I know you want to. More importantly,'' he waggles his eyebrows, ''_you_ know you want to. One dinner won't kill you, black eyed demon girl. I'm not even sure you _can_ be killed. And frankly, I find that very attractive.''

She purses her lips, suddenly very aware that they're in a room full of people who are all slinging their gazes back and forth between them like they're watching a tennis match. Seated comfortably in Damon's lap as she plays with his ring, even Bray looks like she's waiting on pins and needles for her mother's answer. ''Why do you even want to go out with me anyway?'' Ruby asks. ''I'd think you of all people would have higher standards. Someone with a little less baggage, perhaps?''

Damon suddenly looks very serious as he leans forwards and stares at her just a tad too intensely. _''Penso che non abbiamo per caso raduno, _Ruby.''

Ruby does her best to breathe deeply. ''I can't go out. I have a kid.''

''Bring her. We can go to Chuck E. Cheese and make out in the ball pit. It'll be romantic.''

A small smile manages to dance across her lips before she reels it back in, swallows down laughter and remains stoic. ''No.'' (Caroline, easily the person most fascinated by this chick flick moment, sighs in defeat and relaxes back against her seat.)

Damon, however, does not seem the least bit dejected. ''That's all right. You'll fall in love with me eventually. Isn't that right, _bambina?_''

Excited to use the new word she's managed to master, Bray perks up and smiles. ''Yeah!''

''Yeah,'' Damon nods and holds his hand out for a high five. ''That's what I'm talking about.''

* * *

In the middle of the afternoon on a Thursday while Bray is enjoying her time at her newest daycare, Ruby is seated at the bar in The Grill, scouring the wanted ads for a job. Then (naturally) Damon slides onto the seat next to her. _''Stai da solo?''_

Ruby sighs and keeps her eyes on the newspaper. ''Damon,'' she greets tonelessly. Honestly, why this man wants to chase her is beyond her comprehension. It's not like she's the most stable girl out there. (It's also painfully obvious he's got a thing for his brother's girlfriend.) Then again, he is a vampire. Maybe stable isn't his thing.

He leans over to her to whisper Italian in her ear like he's whispering some dirty little secret. _''Stavo sognando di voi.'' _The corners of her lips curve downwards and she ignores him. ''I was dreaming about you,'' he repeats in English. ''You were doing very, very naughty things. Sinful things, even. You rocked my dream world, Buff.''

She caps her pen and looks up at him curiously. ''Do you know of any job openings in town?''

His lip curls in disgust, mostly likely at the mere thought of manual labor. ''Why would you want to know that?''

''Because being a mom isn't cheap,'' she informs him. ''That shed some light?'' When he blinks at her dumbly, she shakes her head and rolls her eyes, tossing her pen onto the counter. ''I'm living in a tiny room at a B&B and despite the fact that Mrs. Flowers is about 100 years old, she never misses an opportunity to take my money. And in order to keep feeding and clothing my daughter, I need money.''

He nods, mulls that over and then orders a drink. ''You know,'' he says casually. ''I'm quite rich.''

''Well, congrats on that.''

''I could give you some money. ...If you go out with me that is.''

''That's called prostitution, fangs.''

''Such an ugly word, Ruby.''

''For the last time,'' she says slowly. ''I am not going out with you.''

''Oh, come on! _Dare il tuo amore, tesoro mio!_''

She gathers the newspaper and slides off the barstool. ''I'll see you later, Damon. Maybe Jenna will help me.''

''Hey!'' He calls after her. ''Need a place to stay? Move in with me!''

She stops in her tracks and turns slowly. ''...Huh?''

He nods. ''Yeah, I'll be your sugar daddy. I'll bet I can even get Bray into the most prestigious boarding school in Mystic Falls. I have a lot of sway here.''

''She's one.''

''It's never too early to plan for the best education possible.''

''_Ciao, _Damon.''

* * *

With Damon Salvatore becoming harder and harder to resist and money becoming tight, Ruby is more and more determined than ever to get a job, an apartment and some space to breathe so she can remind herself why getting involved with him is a bad idea. Because she's starting to forget her reasons. (Dean is still the number one reason, even though she's trying so damn hard to let him go.)

Ric pulls through for her like a big damn hero (a hero who blushes when she declares, possibly a little overdramatically, that he's officially her hero _and_ her new best friend; don't tell Jenna) and gets her a job in the office of the high school. Unfortunately, it means more time away from Bray (and, to a lesser extent, Damon) but it's a job and she takes it without a second thought. The rest of the Scooby Gang becomes a constant though. And thank God for Jenna and Molly's weekly phone calls because with all the teenage crap she finds herself involved in, Ruby's not totally convinced she wouldn't blow her brains out if it weren't for the adult company she finds in Jenna.

She floats along in life and finds that, despite her complaints, she quite likes this place. A lot, actually. It's starting to feel like home to her. Caroline is always willing to babysit when she's not sucking face with Tyler, Stefan's a big sweetheart, Jenna and Ric are wonderful people and when he's not hitting on her, Damon is a great friend. He calms down slightly as time goes on (the Italian dries up and the endless advances dwindle) but he never gives up completely on his mission to get her to go out with him.

All in all, Bray is happy and Ruby is happy and that's great. There's just one problem: Her living situation. There are no good, cheap, safe apartments in Mystic Falls and she's still stuck living with Mrs. Flowers. She's beginning to dread coming home at night because the room is so cramped and Bray hates it just as much as she does. The girl throws epic tantrums when it's bedtime. Ruby's pretty sure that if Bray had to choose between Caroline and Ruby, she'd choose Caroline just because Caroline's got the nice house with the big TV and the big muscle-y boyfriend who can throw her up in the air and catch her. (Ruby's not down with that, by the way, and has on numerous times threatened to put dog boy to sleep if he keeps doing that. One of these days Bray's gonna wind up with a concussion from either bashing her head into the ceiling or being dropped. Well, either that or she's going to end up throwing up on Tyler and wouldn't that teach him?)

Yes, her living situation sucks and yes, she needs to do something about it ASAP, but what can she do? Jenna offers her the spare room in the Gilbert house but to be honest, that house is crowded enough with two teenagers living there and Ric all but moved in. Caroline attempts to offer her a room in her house but Damon shoots that down for her because Liz Forbes is a member of the Founder's Council and apparently, being found out by the Founder's Council (pun not intended) is the last thing Ruby wants. Just when the situation is becoming dire, the Salvatore brothers come to her with a surprising proposition.

''You want me to move in with you?'' Ruby asks incredulously, eyes darting back and forth between them. ''Because...Because..._really? _Do you two have any idea what it's like to live with a baby? Especially _my_ baby? Because let me explain something to you boys; between her father's fire and my attitude, she will explode at the drop of a hat. And I mean that quite literally. She'll interrupt your beauty sleep and your drinking, Damon. Stefan, she'll interrupt your journal time and your brooding over Elena. Not to mention, do you know how difficult it will be to get laid with a baby in the house?''

''Girls like babies,'' Damon interjects.

''Not if it's keeping them from getting laid,'' Ruby points out helpfully.

''Ruby,'' Stefan says gently. ''I don't want to overstep my boundaries or anything but...you need help.''

Ruby sucks in a breath and looks away from them. This would be the part where she gets all bitchy and defensive, right? She's doing the best that she can as a single mother under these circumstances and that_ has _to be enough, doesn't it? But in all honesty, she does need help. (She loves her daughter more than life itself, but she doesn't know what the fuck she's doing half the time.) ''Stefan...''

''A nice place to stay with a fully stocked kitchen and you can save your money,'' Stefan says kindly. ''It'll be good for you. It'll be good for Bray.''

''Seriously, Buffy,'' Damon cuts in. ''Let someone help you for once.''

Ruby looks down at her hands and has to swallow the lump in her throat. ''Why are you doing this for me?'' She asks eventually, lifting her eyes to Stefan.

Stefan's mouth works for a second without any actual words coming out and then he clears his throat and ducks his head like he's embarrassed. ''Because you're my friend,'' he admits quietly.

''Yeah,'' Damon adds on wryly. ''Isn't it obvious with the hair and the brooding? He's Angel.'' He frowns at his own analogy, looking deep in thought as he shakes his head. ''Just don't do that whole sexing thing that Buffy and Angel did because - okay, you know what?'' He looks mildly disgusted, reaching for his drink. ''Forget that metaphor. It did _not_ work out like I planned.''

''Ruby.'' Stefan sighs impatiently, sending his brother a deeply annoyed look out of the corner of his eye. ''Do you accept our offer or not?''

She thinks long and hard about what it would be like to live with the Salvatore brothers and then she makes her decision. ''No.'' It's almost comical to watch both of their faces fall at the same time, their puppy dog eyes coming out full force. It's times like these that it is not hard to see the brotherly resemblance. Ruby smirks brightly and lets out a tiny little laugh escape her lips as they stare at her. ''I'll do it,'' she says. ''But I'm paying you rent and I'm buying my own groceries. I'm not a charity case. Agreed?''

They look at each other slightly awed and then they nod. ''Agreed.''

(Stefan is awkward and tense in her embrace when she hugs him, but he melts like a little boy with his arms around her waist and his face in her hair. Damon looks at her for a long time even after his brother has left and then he steps forwards and presses a kiss to her forehead. _''Gradisco voi di piu e piu,_'' he whispers in her ear.)

* * *

Bray is utterly_ thrilled _when they move in with the Salvatore brothers because she loves them both and she loves their spacious home even more. It's not as awkward as Ruby suspected it would be. Stefan keeps to himself and since Damon has toned down the flirting, she genuinely enjoys being around him. (And even though he'd never admit it out loud, he is surprisingly great with Bray.) No, it's not as awkward as she thought it would be. More importantly, it's not as awkward as it _should_ be.

She and Damon fall into a sort of pattern. It's a picture of faux domestication and stability that she so badly wants to give Bray. Ruby herself enjoys it so much that she allows herself to forget about Bray's father who is still on her mind every day when she wakes up and the way Damon's eyes gravitate towards Elena Gilbert whenever she's in the room.

He's changing her, this man. She has a dream about Dean the first night in the Salvatore Boarding House and when she wakes up panting and gasping for air with her heart aching in her chest, she does something that she hasn't done in a long time. She doesn't run. (Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knows it is only a matter of time before she stops fighting and gives in to Damon and his charms.)

One day in February near Valentine's Day while she's making Bray lunch and Damon's sitting at the kitchen table with Bray on his knee, Ric and Caroline come tearing into the room like two twin tornados of panic. ''Nice entrance,'' Damon compliments them.

''We need your help,'' Ric says, blatantly ignoring Damon and focusing his attention on Ruby.

''With what?''

''The Valentine's Day dance is tonight and we're one chaperone short.'' Oh, hell no. ''Jenna was supposed to do it, but she's got the flu.''

Ruby looks from Ric to Caroline and then back to Ric. ''You're joking. Please tell me you're joking.''

''Please, Ruby,'' Caroline begs, clasping her hands together. ''My stupid un-fun witch of a principal says if we don't have the right amount of chaperones, the dance will be off!''

''Oh no,'' Ruby deadpans. ''Guess you'll just have to have pre-marital sex and disappoint your parents like normal teenagers.''

''It won't be that bad,'' Ric says half heartedly. ''At least one boneheaded jock always tries to spike the punch and if I confiscate a flask, I'll share.''

''Yeah!'' Caroline nods animatedly. ''That's a good deal, right?'' When Ruby scowls, the smile drops off Caroline's face. ''Okay, I'm gonna level with you here, Ruby. Elena and I have been planning this stupid dance since December and if it gets cancelled, I'll kill myself.''

''You're already dead.''

''Ruby...''

Ruby sighs and puts a hand on her forehead. ''What am I supposed to do with Bray?''

''Oh, Tyler and I aren't going,'' Caroline says cheerfully. ''We can watch her. He hates these things. We're going to stay in and watch The Notebook.''

''But you just said - ''

''Wow,'' Damon drawls. ''You've certainly got him on a short leash, don't you? He house trained yet?''

''Shut _up_, Damon,'' Caroline says bitingly.

''At least tell me you're going to have sex after the chick flick.''

''Well, yeah.''

''Doggy style, I'm guessing?''

''Damon!'' Ruby turns to give him a pointed glare, gesturing towards Bray. ''She's one. She can understand what you're saying.''

''Listen, I know what I said,'' Caroline sighs. ''But honestly, I've kinda started to hate those dances. Elena's the boss at the actual party, I just plan it.''

''So, you're making me go instead?'' Ruby yelps.

''Um...pretty much. Does that mean you'll do it?''

''...Fine, but you two so owe me for this.''

''I am forever indebted,'' Caroline nods.

''What she said,'' Ric adds.

(As soon as they're gone, Ruby turns to Damon with a sigh and a grimace. ''I'm going to regret this, aren't I?'')

* * *

''Well, look at you all gussied up and ready to paint the town red.''

Barefoot, missing an earring and realizing that she will never be on time for anything ever, Ruby can't help but smirk and send a glance towards Damon. ''Seriously?'' She retrieves her missing earring, resists the urge to cry out a triumphant _aha! _and levels Damon with an arched eyebrow, hands on her hips. ''Your age is showing, fangboy. Learn some new slang.''

He shrugs and turns his attention back to Bray, who is much too busy playing with her blocks to pay attention to the adult conversation going on around her. ''BRB, loling forever.''

''...You used to have a lot of time on your hands, didn't you?''

The corners of his lips twitch upwards. ''You aren't wrong.''

Ruby turns to look at herself in the mirror, brushing invisible wrinkles out of her red dress. It feels like it has been forever since she has worn a dress. In reality, it actually hasn't been that long. She wore a dress when she spent Christmas with Danny's family. Caroline was very clear about the dress code for this dance. Or as clear as someone can be when they're talking a mile a minute and must be hyped up on _something_ because normal people don't talk that fast. Red is the color of the night and formal wear is a must. ...Why is she doing this again? Satisfied, she whirls around and grabs Bray's jacket. ''Baby, come here.''

There's a blur in front of her eyes and a breeze that sweeps hair out of her face. Pressed up against her back, Damon leans down to whisper in her ear. ''Yes?''

''Cute,'' she mutters, pushing herself away from him. ''Bray - '' the little girl looks up from chewing on her toy block. '' - It's time to go, baby. We're going to go see your best friend Caroline. That sound good?'' Bray's eyes light up and she begins to chatter on and on about Caroline. Ruby takes that as a _yes, mother, that sounds satisfactory. _''You know,'' she sighs out as she begins to wrestle the little girl into her jacket and shoes. ''I like Caroline just fine. She's a great babysitter. But has anyone ever stopped to think that the only reason she gets along so well with Bray is because she's basically a giant toddler in a woman's body?''

''I've thought about that,'' Damon agrees casually. ''But then I try not to think about it because - hey. I hit that.''

That's about as surprising as something that is not surprising at all. ''Damon, who haven't you slept with?''

''Well, you. For starters.''

She determines that the best course of action is to brush that comment off with a roll of her eyes, still struggling to get the extremely uncooperative Bray ready to go. ''Can't you just watch her?'' She whines after Bray has kicked off her left shoe for the millionth time, still babbling about the apparent awesomeness that is Caroline.

''I'd love to,'' Damon replies easily, slipping into his leather jacket. ''Unfortunately, I have plans.''

''What kind of plans?''

''The secret kind.'' He loops an arm around her waist and pulls her to him, close enough that she can feel his body shaking with laughter. She tenses unnoticeably in his grasp and swallows. He reaches forwards to ruffle Bray's hair with a wink. ''I'll see you later, rugrat. Be sure and make Barbie's life a living hell, okay?'' When he lets Ruby go, hand lingering on her shoulder for just a second too long before he strides out the door, a whoosh of air leaves her lungs and she has to clear her throat. She knows why she can't do this with him. But it's getting harder and harder to follow her own rules.

* * *

The Valentine's Day dance at the high school is exactly what it sounds like. A painfully long and humiliating experience for all. With love songs and red roses. There's just no way to get around that. The entire school building and its population has OD'd on the theme. It's all red and pink and white and black and love songs blare too loudly from the speakers and Ruby thinks she might throw up. Ric, on the other hand, has fallen asleep. Everyone who comes in the door is given a single red rose; Ruby has a sudden impulse to throw it on the ground and stomp on it. She discards it hastily onto a nearby table instead. Because she is a mature adult.

The one bright light in this horrific car crash? Before Ric falls asleep, he comes through on that flask thing. She spends most of her time sipping at something that is definitely not the sickeningly sweet red punch being offered. Not enough to get drunk, just enough to make this evening bearable. (Barely.)

Halfway through the evening, Elena approaches her by the punch bowl with a tentative smile and tired looking eyes. ''Hey, Ruby.''

''Elena,'' Ruby greets civilly. ''Where's Stefan?''

Elena shrugs, pouring herself a glass of punch. ''Off somewhere talking to a friend.''

Ruby keeps her body aimed towards the masses of students, but slides her gaze to Elena. When Elena takes a dainty little sip of the liquid, she instantly coughs and sputters and Ruby can't help but snicker. Okay, that was good. She cannot explain her trepidation when it comes to young Miss. Gilbert, but she is sure it is not jealousy. It can't be. ''Well,'' Elena manages to get out, putting a hand over her heart. ''That didn't take long. I wonder who spiked the punch considering Tyler isn't here.''

Ruby grins. ''Yes. I wonder.'' What? She had to do something with the leftover alcohol in the flask. (Also, someone needed to give this shitty party CPR.) She drifts away from Elena and takes a seat at an empty table, only for Elena to follow and sit down next to her. There is a cheesy 80's love song playing and couples all but fornicating on the dance floor. And Elena is terrible at small talk. ''I wonder how many teenage pregnancies will be the result of this night,'' Ruby murmurs idly.

At that, Elena actually laughs (and it's the first time Ruby has ever heard the girl laugh). It makes her tired eyes light up and for the first time, Ruby catches a glimpse of the girl those boys are infatuated with. Before she can say anything, Stefan is weaving his way through the crowd and taking a seat next to Elena as he offers Ruby a smile. ''Are you having fun yet?''

''Oh, loads,'' Ruby nods. ''Can't believe I ever thought this was a waste of time.''

''Eh,'' Stefan shrugs and gazes down at Elena adoringly. ''It's not so bad if you're in the right company.''

Elena blushes and swats at his chest.

''You two are so sweet you're making my teeth hurt,'' Ruby deadpans. She has always hated Valentine's Day. It's a stupid half baked holiday that is just an excuse for men to pretend to be white knights and clingy, needy women to freak out when their boyfriend's don't pay attention to them. So, yeah. She's always loathed Valentine's Day. But it is so much worse now that love has screwed her and all this stupid holiday is doing is making her remember how badly she wants what Stefan and Elena have, no matter how nauseating it is. ''Why aren't you two tearing up the dance floor?'' Ruby asks, cocking her head to the side. ''Why are you spending your time with the MILF?''

Stefan and Elena exchange glances. ''Damon may have asked us to keep you company,'' Elena admits quietly.

Ruby smirks, perhaps a little bitterly. ''Well, Damon's not here.''

Stefan's eyes catch something over Ruby's shoulder and dark, sad, troubled eyes light up with twinkles Ruby knows all too well. ''Actually,'' he says. ''That's not entirely true.'' He gives Ruby one last knowing smile and then plucks a red rose from the table, standing and offering Elena his hand. ''Come on, Elena. Let's dance.'' And then he puts the rose between his teeth and spins her out onto the dance floor while she's giggling madly like a school girl in love.

Based off of Stefan's attitude, Ruby figures she shouldn't be surprised when Damon drops into the now vacant seat next to her. ''It looks like Cupid threw up in here.''

She arches an eyebrow. ''Thought you had plans.''

Damon throws her a lazy smirk and a wink. ''I do.''

_...Oh._

Her grip on the plastic cup tightens and she presses her lips together.

* * *

''So, why'd you come to Mystic Falls anyway?''

Ruby shoots Damon a look and crosses one leg over the other. For the past half an hour, things have gone from boring to extreme flirting and that little needle is still rising on the scale. If she's not careful, extreme flirting could end in extreme nakedness. To be blunt. ''You know why.''

He rolls his eyes and leans back in his chair. His arm is slung over the back of her chair and her body is nearly leaning into his and she knows this is a very dangerous path she's treading, but she can't bring herself to stop. ''I know why,'' he repeats slowly. He seems to think about that for a minute, looking at her closely like he's trying to read her mind. ''But do I really? Where were you before Virginia?''

She ducks her head and gets flashbacks of Danny and New York at Christmas time. ''New York. We stayed there for Christmas.''

''And before that?''

''Ohio.''

''Before that?''

''Okay, so we travel a lot,'' she sighs, lifting her head. ''I don't see how - ''

''Why?''

It's not that the question shocks her. That's not why she presses her lips together and doesn't answer him. It's just that she's not exactly sure how to answer it. Honestly, there are a lot of reasons she avoids settling. Because if she settles, she'll be doing just that. Settling. She wants a normal life, she'll admit that. But what she wants is the_ right _normal life in the _right _town with the _right_ job and the _right_ person to live it with. Mystic Falls has made her wonder about these things. Is she wrong about who she thinks is right? Is this the right life she's been searching for? Is Damon the right guy? Was Dean Winchester just a roadblock on her way to Damon Salvatore? Those are all questions she has been asking herself recently because Damon seems to understand certain things about her that Dean didn't. What do you think that means? ''I wanted to see the world,'' she whispers, staring into her empty cup. (True, but technically still a lie in many ways.)

Damon looks over at her like he doesn't believe her and then lets it go, shrugging and looking back at the teenagers. ''I've seen it,'' he says flippantly. ''It's overrated.''

She laughs lightly. ''That so?''

''Sure. The wonders of the world lose their wonder when you've got eternity to see them. When you know you have all the time in the world, that crazed rush to see things before you die isn't there. Tell me something, Ruby. You're a demon. Will you live forever?''

Honestly? She doesn't know.

''Damon.'' Her voice is low and serious as she leans forwards to place a hand on his knee without even realizing she's doing it, frowning softly. ''Can I ask you a question?''

''You just did.''

''Be serious here for a second. Just a second, all right?'' Her fingernails dig into his knee slightly; he doesn't appear to notice. ''Do you ever get lonely?''

His jaw clenches and those piercing blue eyes that have a tendency to look right through people seem to deflate in defeat. For about a second. Then he's all calm and control as he shakes his head and looks away from her. ''No.'' (She's pretty sure that's a lie.) ''Do you?''

She looks away. ''No.'' (Liar.) She stays quiet for a moment and then his fingers brush across hers. Startled, she realizes her hand is still on his knee and now there's electricity shooting up her arm and down the rest of her body. She draws her hand back quickly and when she meets his eyes, she catches sight of a flare of something that makes his lips twitch. Her gaze travels over his shoulder just to get away from those striking eyes of his that could unravel her with one deep stare. Her eyes land on Ric, awake and alert, talking to a familiar woman who is not supposed to be here. Jenna. And she doesn't look the least bit sick.

Oh, Caroline. You cunning vampire Barbie, you.

* * *

Ric coughs on his drink when he sees her approaching them. ''It was Caroline's idea,'' he yelps as Jenna pats him on the back.

''For the record, I didn't want to fool you,'' Jenna starts. ''But I did agree with Caroline when she said you were avoiding the issue. I'm only here because I got bored and I figured someone should probably be here to be the designated driver and...you know...keep Ric from falling asleep.''

Ruby scoffs, letting her hands fall to her hips. ''What issue am I supposedly avoiding?''

''The Damon issue.''

''What Damon issue? There is no Damon issue. We're friends.'' Ruby pauses, her frown deepens and she leans a little closer to Jenna with a disbelieving raised eyebrow. ''And don't you hate him?''

''I don't hate him,'' Jenna responds calmly, sipping at her drink. ''I just dislike him incredibly strongly. But see, here's the thing.'' She shoves her drink at Ric and wraps an arm around Ruby's shoulder, turning her around so they can stare at Damon in the distance. ''You're not my teenage niece who is dating his brother. You're a grown woman who obviously has something with the man. Think about it. You seem to have this weird way with him. You make him almost...tolerable. You could actually be good for each other. The bad boy meets the good girl - '' (The what now? The good girl? Never heard that one before. Seriously.) '' - and falls madly in love. She changes him, makes him a better person, yada, yada, yada. It's an age old cliché - ''

''Uh, don't movies like that usually end with one of them dying?'' Ric interrupts. When both women throw him a glare, he holds his hands up and takes a gulp of Jenna's drink. ''Okay then. Never mind. I'll just be standing here, drinking my booze.''

''That's my booze, and their story doesn't have to end like that. You two could shake it up a little.'' Jenna giggles quietly and shakes her head, drawing her hand away to pat Ruby on the shoulder. ''And okay, so you're a mom. So what? Does that mean you can't find happiness?''

Wow. Jenna is...saying a lot of things, isn't she? Possibly some things Ruby doesn't want to hear right at this particular moment when she is trying so hard to resist his allure. Damon looks up, catches her eye and there's sparks. Fucking hell, there's sparks. ''I should call Caroline and check on Bray,'' Ruby mumbles. She ignores Jenna's weak protests, misses the look on Damon's face when she looks away from him quickly and turns to escape. It's something she is incredibly used to. Escaping. It's something she does so often that it has become something of a second nature to her. Unlike all the other times, when she has had a clear running path, this time someone gets in her way. She bumps into someone before she can make it to the door and she looks up into the eyes she is trying to avoid. Damn vampires and their superspeed. ''Can you not do that please?'' She crosses her arms over her chest defensively. ''It's disturbing.''

He smiles easily and holds his hand out to her. _''Balliamo?''_

She resists the urge to bite down on her lip. ''Damon...'' _You're blocking my escape route._

''One dance,'' he says, taking her hand the second she uncrosses her arms. ''It won't kill you. Don't be such a killjoy.''

''Damon.'' She sighs like this is some huge burden as he leads her onto the dance floor, but she places a hand on his shoulder anyway. ''If I had said no, you would've dragged me out here anyway, am I right?''

Damon laughs, looking down at her. ''Yeah, you're right. Well, come on. You can't go to a dance and not dance. That's just wrong.''

He makes her smile. Dangerous boy. She's been here before. Her mind is going back and forth between the pros and cons of Damon Salvatore and she has been here before. The last time she developed a mental pro/con list, he wound up getting torn to shreds, she wound up knocked up and it all eventually ended with harsh words and a stupid fucking silver ring. Pro/con lists can only mean bad things. (Hey, at least with Damon she doesn't have to worry about the whole getting knocked up part.) ''So,'' she smiles and hopes it's convincing. ''How do you know all this Italian anyway?''

''Salvatore is an Italian name, you know.''

''I know, but - ''

''My mother taught me,'' he says before he twirls her. ''Before she died, she'd sit down with me every day and teach me. After she died, I taught Stefan.''

''Your father didn't?''

His eyes darken for a moment, but that smirk still remains firmly planted on his lips. ''My father wasn't...the nicest guy.''

A frown tugs at her lips. So...a bad boy with a surprising soft side who has a classic car, a leather jacket, a younger, brooding brother, a dead mother and some heavy duty daddy issues? Oh, god. She has a _type_. That's embarrassing.

''Plus,'' he continues. ''I spent a few years in Italy awhile back so I guess some things stuck. Now,'' his smirk widens and he leans closer, just close enough to make her breath catch. ''If we're going to talk about the past, let's talk about yours.''

She chuckles nervously. ''Oh, let's not go there.''

''Hey, I talked about my dead mother. You at least have to tell me how you ended up with a kid because - and don't take this the wrong way - you don't exactly seem like the maternal type.''

Well, that is true. She does generally hate all kids who aren't her own ('cause her kid is awesome) because they're loud and messy and they get into things they shouldn't and they kind of smell. ''I got pregnant and then nine months later, Bray made her grand entrance after torturing me for three days. I thought she would never come out. That's about it.''

''Hmm...and Bray's dad? Where does he fit in?''

''He doesn't,'' she answers shortly.

''Deadbeat?''

''No. He just...had some things to do that didn't involve me and Bray. He's not a bad guy, really. He's actually a good guy. He's just - '' She stops herself short, sucking in a breath and shaking her head. ''Why do you even want to know? You have zero interest in other people, Damon.''

''I have interest in you,'' he shoots back quickly. ''That's why I want to know. I want to know I'm not getting in between a relationship.'' He pauses and tilts his head to the side momentarily. ''Not that I would mind terribly if I was.''

Right. The lack of morals and all._ Please_. If that was the case, he would've fucked Elena into loving him a long time ago. ''Well, you're not,'' she says softly. ''Getting in between anything, I mean. Dean and I aren't...We were never really...We'll never be...'' She trails off and gives up trying to sum up her _whatever_ with Dean in one sentence. That is not going to happen. ''There's nothing to get between.''

''Then why are you still running from me?'' He asks.

If she's not imagining it, he sounds amused, exasperated and slightly desperate all at the same time. She wonders how he does that. ''I'm not running,'' she defends herself. ''I'm right here dancing with you, aren't I?''

''Give it time.''

She stops dancing, body tensing as her hands fall away from him. ''Damon, why do we have to go there? We're friends. We're good as friends. Why can't we just be friends?''

''Because I don't want to be your friend,'' he snarls out through his teeth, eyes darkening in frustration. ''And you don't want to be my friend either. You women,'' he laughs bitterly and shakes his head. ''You all want to be my_ friend_ without caring what I want. Do I look like your_ friend_? You're just like Elena.''

She takes extreme offense to that. ''I am_ nothing _like Elena.''

''Really?'' He asks calmly. ''Then prove it.''

She can't find the words to reply to that; they bubble up in her throat and then get lost somewhere on her tongue and she's left standing there staring at him like an idiot, still trying to find the words to say something. That pro/con list in her head is coming along quite nicely. It's too bad she doesn't know whether to root for the pro side or the con side. He is the one to make a move eventually. His hand cups her cheek and he goes in for a kiss. Her brain jumpstarts and she backs away quickly. ''I have to go,'' she manages to get out, desperately trying to get air.

He sends her a look that can only be described as pleading, something so wildly out of character for Damon Salvatore it makes her heart break just a little. She turns away when she can't bear to look at him anymore and she runs. ''And there she goes,'' she hears him say softly, almost regretfully.

Her throat is beginning to hurt.

* * *

''Hey, Caroline.''

She means to chew the vampire girl out for her attempt at playing matchmaker and its disastrous consequences, but for some reason she can't bear to upset the girl. She imagines Caroline upset and it's just not something she wants. She's not sure why that is. In an empty and darkened classroom, Ruby leans back against a desk and tries to control the aching in her throat.

_''Oh, hi, Ruby!'' _Caroline chirps. _''How's the dance going? Are you having a good time?''_

''It's...It's fine.''

_''...Are you okay?''_ Caroline asks, her cheerful voice shifting into a concerned murmur. _''You sound funny. You're not...You're not mad at me, are you?''_

Ruby licks her lips and looks down at the floor at the sound of the girl's sheepish voice. ''I'm not mad at you. Listen,'' she clears her throat and attempts to smile weakly even though Caroline can't see her, fingers gripping the cell phone perhaps a touch too tightly. ''I just called to check on you guys. Bray's not being too much trouble, is she?''

_''Oh, no! Of course not.'' _Caroline's voice is light and happy. Ruby swears she can hear the smile in her voice. It makes a choked laugh escape her lips. _''Bray's wonderful. She's passed out on the couch with Tyler right now. We watched Bambi. It was a very emotionally draining experience for the both of them. I'm going to start calling Tyler Thumper from now on.''_ There's a pause on the other line and then a small, high pitched giggle. _''I probably shouldn't have shared that.''_

''Great,'' Ruby laughs. ''I'm glad you're having fun.''

_''Well, you should be having fun too! Go dance or something. This is supposed to be your fun night out.''_

''I'll try,'' she lies.

_''That's all I ask.''_

''I won't be home late. Hey, if she wakes up don't let her eat a bunch of junk, okay? Give her an apple or something.''

_''Will do. I'll see you later. Try to have a nice time, Ruby.''_

''Bye, Caroline.'' Ruby ends the phone call and the small smile lingers on her lips for a moment before it falls away. She thinks she has just put her finger on why she doesn't violently dislike Caroline Forbes. Sure, the immortal seventeen year old can be tiring and often times annoying and neurotic, but she is the quintessential teenage girl and teenage girls were built with one purpose and one purpose only. To test their parents patience. But Caroline is also sweet and funny and loyal and a good friend and strong and most importantly, she reminds Ruby of her daughter. That is where the soft spot comes from. Caroline reminds Ruby of Bray.

She sighs heavily and brings a hand up to massage her temple. Her eyes are like shutters; they try to shut out the world, but that only leaves her with the movie playing behind her eyelids of the look on Damon's face when she ran. That pro/con list just keeps getting longer and longer. She knows this feeling. This twisting inside of her. Like she needs him. (And as a general rule, her motto is that she is Ruby and she doesn't need _anyone _except her daughter. So you can see why this feeling would be disconcerting to her.) She has felt it before. Once. And when it was taken away from her, it very nearly broke her into a million little pieces. She can't go through that again. She cannot allow herself to be put through that again. She keeps her heart in a locked box to protect herself from the Deans of the world, don't you see?

But...

Someone always has to come along and break through, isn't that right? Isn't that the way it goes? Even if there's Dean and Elena, heart can still bleed for others, can't they?

''Would it be so bad?''

Ruby looks up sharply, a strangled gasp escaping her throat.

Damon is leaning against the doorframe, trying too hard to look careless. There is a certain twinge of vulnerability in his eyes that he has never let her see before and she doesn't know how to react to it. ''To be with me?'' He levels his gaze with her, mouth drawn into a tight line. ''Would it be such an awful thing?''

''Damon - ''

He pushes off the door, lips twisting into an offended scowl. ''You all think I'm so horrible. Not worth it, not good enough. And I get that. I'm the bad guy, I'll admit that. When there's Stefan to go for, why would anyone choose me? But you...'' He shakes his head. ''Ruby, come on. Look at us. We're the same.'' He grasps her arm gently, pulling her towards him. ''We could be so...so...''

''So what?''

He blinks, looks at her for a second like he's battling with himself about something and then he steps forwards and kisses her. His hands grip her wrists like he's trying to keep her from pushing him away and her back is pressed into the desk, but she still kisses back because she can't seem to make herself do anything else. She kisses back because he makes her forget. But then, of course, she has to remember. She wrenches free of his grip easily, pushes at his chest and stumbles away from him. ''No. _No._''

''Why?'' He demands. ''Why not? What's stopping you?'' His eyes flash and there's a glimpse of fangs as he steps towards her, one hand outstretched like he wants to grab her and never let her go. ''They don't love us, Ruby!''

She bites down on her lip hard enough to draw blood, heart thundering in her chest, eyes burning painfully.

He doesn't seem to notice. ''They don't love us. Elena,_ Dean_...they don't...We're the second choices, don't you see that? I'm second to Stefan; you're second to whatever the hell that idiot left you and _his kid _for. And...And they're not here. He's not here, Ruby, and neither is she. I'm here. _We're_ here. That has to mean...We have to mean _something_ to _someone_! Why can't we mean something to each other?''

Neither of them says anything for a long time. He's catching breath he doesn't need and she's trying to blink away any and all traces of tears. She doesn't think about it for a surprising amount of time. Mostly because she has spent the last few weeks thinking about it. She reacts on impulse and gut instinct instead. It's what she's good at. It's what she used to do all the time. When he says her name quietly, she darts forwards and catches his lips in her own. He kisses back instantly, hand coming up to tangle in her hair. Her fingers move from grasping his shirt to curling in his hair and his free hand slips around her waist, pulling her closer. _Try to have a nice time, Ruby_, Caroline had said.

Well, okay, Caroline. She's having a _nice _time.

They're replacements, you know. For Elena and Dean. They both know that. But he's right. Elena is off somewhere with Stefan, basking in the glow of the younger Salvatore's love and shamelessly flaunting it in Damon's face like a vicious bitch and Dean is off somewhere saving the world, drinking much too much and pretending he doesn't have a daughter out there who needs him as much as he needs her. But Damon and Ruby? They're right here and they're _lonely._

And what's the harm in a little companionship? What's the harm in finding someone who makes you feel like you matter? Like you're wanted? Frankly, Ruby's beginning to think it's about time she got a little something other than the memories of Dean's broken promises.

(That may be true. But how long do you think they can keep this up?)

**end part three**

**

* * *

**

**AN: Much like Ruby, I think I have put my finger on why I adore Caroline Forbes so much. Before Dianna Agron became teenage Lila Bray in my mind, Candice Accola was who I saw as Bray. Therefore, she now reminds me of her. Also, yay! Ruby's finally allowing herself a smidge of happiness. I think it's about time. I'll admit, there was Danny but she never really gave her heart to him. Damon...is different. He's not Dean. But he's definitely something. Okay! I'm going to stop babbling now and get back to work on the next chapter of **_**Queen of Hearts **_**because I have been neglecting that poor beast.**

**One more thing. Wow, there was a lot of Italian in this chapter, wasn't there? I'm going to be honest with you. I don't speak Italian. I got most of it off of a website. And yes there are quite possibly some mistakes, but you know what? I like it. I'm going to keep it in there. And I'm going to give you all the translations of everything Damon said in Italian. So here yo go:**

_**Ciao, bella  
**_**Hello (goodbye), beautiful**

_**Posso offriti qualcosa da bere?  
**_**Can I buy you a drink?**

_**Fa cosi caldo qui o e la tua presenza?  
**_**Is it hot in here, or is it just you?**

_**Penso che non abbiamo per caso raduno  
**_**I think we haven't met each other by chance**

_**Bambina  
**_**Little girl**

_**Stai da solo?  
**_**Are you alone?**

_**Stavo sognando di voi  
**_**I was dreaming about you**

_**Dare il tuo amore, tesoro mio  
**_**Give your love, my treasure**

_**Gradisco voi di piu e piu  
**_**I like you more and more**

_**Balliamo?  
**_**Dance?**

**There we go! I think I got them all. If I missed a translation, let me know.**


End file.
